Valentine Is Not That Into You

Another year. Another fast-flying February. Another Valentine´s Day.

A holiday that unless falls on a weekend or an actual national holiday, does not count as a holiday on your tax roll.

What´s Valentine´s Day anyway? To give a quick run-down of the holiday, Saint Valentine was a bishop whose martyrdom is attributed to fighting for Christendom and freedom of expressing religion. He was put to death on February 14th 269, and to honor the sacrifice, we celebrate February 14th by expressing love and compassion to one another.

That´s what Valentine´s day should be about – celebrating love in all forms. But it doesn´t always work that way, does it? And instead of buying chocolate for your mum or your sister, you end up buying chocolate for yourself and commiserating with Netflix about not having a significant other to buy you chocolate instead.

As someone who has been single for some time now, and has no regrets about it, here´s a couple of songs I blast on Valentine´s day to contemplate why it´s okay to chuck a handful of Ferrero´s on that non-holiday of a day.

1. Prince - Kiss

Remember that creepy-ass video of Prince from 1986 dancing in leather pants looking extra sleek? Chernobyl was not the only global disaster that year, Kiss was another one. And the rendition by Tom Jones is even bigger assholery. But, there is a silver lining to Prince singing about willingness to smooch and sex you no matter how ugly, poor, or irrelevant you are – the fact that Prince was one of the most promiscuous guys this planet has ever seen, yet he had more sexual encounters than a decimal system can count - despite not being a conventionally attractive guy.

And you could argue that it was because of his money but that was merely one component in an unsolvable equation called life. The other one is – pheromones. Little hormones in your brain that decide who you fall in love with, who you become attracted to, and vice versa. Therefore, don´t feel discouraged by being single, there is someone for everyone, and your pheromones will have been compatible with someone else´s one day. In the meantime, blast away this creep ass of a song because it´s a total bop (if you think away from the lyrics).

An Instagram account to scroll through while listening to Kiss: @bleumoonbakery

2. Panic at the Disco – I Write Songs Not Tragedies

One of the most iconic pop-rock songs ever. This hit from 2005 could never reach enough mashups, re-recordings, do-overs, covers, for me to stop listening. On the contrary to Kiss, IWSNT has a meaningful lyrics pondering the morality of love, marriage as an institution, and how publicity and public opinion contributes to an idea of love. Since art is for everyone to interpret for themselves, the biggest takeaway for me is the opening verse:

"What a beautiful wedding", says a bridesmaid to a waiter

"And, yes, but what a shame

What a shame the poor groom's bride is a whore."

With a set up for a lovely ceremony, PATD hits you with the trash-talking guests at the wedding. Makes you ponder whether there´s some truth to it, after all. Makes you consider the possibility - if maybe the happy couple didn´t rush into this. Or maybe, those two smack talkers are just jealous. The point is, it makes you think.

It´s the same way in real life. Valentine´s Day makes you think about why you´re single or not single. Why it might be a good thing that you´re yet single. Maybe, being single gives you space to find the person who is just right for you, instead of ending up on a Church doorstep with a heavy heart and a wandering mind.

Instagram account to follow while listening to IWSNT: @thanksalatteblog

3. NSYNC – Bye Bye Bye

Just a big EFF-U to that one relationship that totally ruined your life, soul, and credit score. No comment there. Justin Timberlake and his nineteen-year-old blonde perm can make everything better on a day like this.

Instagram account to follow while listening to BBB: @phanncytreats

4. Zara Larsson – WOW

A relatively new edition to my playlist, Zara, a Swedish popstar of high caliber talent, has been killing it lately.

Originally, I discovered this song when it was a featured soundtrack in the 2020 Netflix movie Work it. I fell in love with it, with the simplicity of explaining how love makes you feel, how it fills every cell of your body with a desire to be better, and most importantly – how worthy of the love you truly are.

To quote Zara:

"Make your jaw drop."

Instagram account to follow while listening to WOW: @zaralarsson

5. The Chainsmokers feat. Halsey – Closer

I know, I know, an overplayed trash with a simplistic beat, and that MTV performance from 2016 should be subjected to an International Court of Justice in Haag. But again, a preliminary judgment can be deceiving. This song sends a major message – relationships that once may have been traumatic, or unhealthy, are not your jailor.

You can move on from them, learn from them, and keep a memory of cherished silver lining moments from them in your heart.

Like that mattress from Boulder, or something? IDFK.

Instagram account to follow while listening to Closer: @thanksalatteblog

Happy Valentine´s Day Everybody!