Tori Quintanar

Self Harm

Someone once told me that self-harming is a coward thing to do. They said that it is selfish to do. That it's a choice. It isn't always a choice. I don't remember what day I picked up a razor blade for the first time. I remember the reason why I did, though. I remember the sting of the blade cutting into my arm. I remember the overwhelming feeling of relief that washed over me after each cut. The same relief I felt each time I picked up the blade and touched it to my skin. I got that same relief with the snap of a hair tie or rubber band against the skin of the wrists. You can't take a razor blade to school, especially when the school itself upped its security measures after a bomb and gun threat was found in the school. You can, however, wear a rubber band or a hair tie on your wrist, in your hair, or even just put it in your backpack or purse. No one thinks anything of it. I remember I used to discreetly snap it on my wrists between classes and sometimes during classes. It was so easy to hide the marks with a jacket.