Steven Christopher McKnight
Bio
Disillusioned twenty-something, future ghost of a drowned hobo, cryptid prowling abandoned operahouses, theatre scholar, prosewright, playwright, aiming to never work again.
Venmo me @MickTheKnight
Stories (94)
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Dank Memes I Liked This Week
Memes are a love language. I stand by this, and I will never not stand by this. I use memes to start conversations I have no idea how to start, and to show my friends I still care about them. That being said, here’s a collection of memes I found funny this week, and some commentary to pad the word count. This is me, sharing memes with you, the reader, to show that I still care about you. Even you, Kevin. Especially you, Kevin.
By Steven Christopher McKnight3 years ago in Geeks
One Piece: Chapter 2 is a Mixed Bag
It’s been about a month since I released my first review of every individual chapter of the legendary manga One Piece. Since then, I have published a grand total of zero reviews. Whoops. Sorry. It seems as though your old boy really let things slip. But I’m back now and, just like Luffy when he sees an enormous plate of meat, it’s time to really dig in. Chapter 1 was really a one-off. I couldn’t adequately rank it because, as a part of the story, it’s entirely unique. It’s a full narrative in one chapter, and to be perfectly honest, that’s kind of how the first few chapters of One Piece start out. The pacing feels weird because we’re cramming a full arc into one sitting. Nonetheless, I will do my best to critique Chapter 2.
By Steven Christopher McKnight3 years ago in Geeks
Steven Reviews: One Piece Chapter 1
One Piece by Eiichiro Oda is a manga series that’s been going on since before I was born. I remember afternoons after school, my brother would flip on episodes of the anime—reruns, to be sure—and all of us would crowd around the old Panasonic and watch them fleetingly because they were on. I remember getting up to maybe the Skypiea Arc, but then the family seemed to lose interest.
By Steven Christopher McKnight4 years ago in Geeks
Fare Thee Well, Basket Face
You see a guy at a coffee shop. He’s simple-looking. Nice hair. Good build. Impeccable forearms. His face is featureless, save for the fact that it’s made of interwoven wicker. No one seems to notice, but you do. What’s he doing in a coffee shop, you ask yourself. He’s got no mouth to drink coffee with. But you think little of it and dive back into the spreadsheets emblazoned across your laptop screen. Maybe that’s why no one else seems to notice him. They’re all preoccupied with their stresses and their relaxations, and the man with the wicker face is just another petty absurdity that cannot be dealt with today.
By Steven Christopher McKnight4 years ago in Fiction
Tragedy in Bratislava (pt.1) - Letters From Slovakia
There is no tragedy in Bratislava—I read an article last week that said that, to get more reads, I need the title to be a good hook. Let’s be honest. Letters From Slovakia sounds a little too artsy to appeal to a reader casually scrolling through Facebook or Instagram. So, alas, you have been fooled! (Apologies to the crowd that wanted to see a tragedy. If you’re still hankering for one, check out my love life. Ayo.) Speaking of artsy, however, I would love to take a quick turn in the style of Letters From Slovakia. That is, instead of the bloggish style of the series so far, I would love to try to frame it in a more literary, achronological lens. So, consider this installment to be a test run of Steven being weird and artsy.
By Steven Christopher McKnight4 years ago in Journal
Oh Shit, I'm Here - Letters From Slovakia
At the time of my writing this, I am suspended over the Atlantic Ocean in a giant metal tube with flaps on the sides of it. That’s pretty neat. Technology is pretty neat. If I was a monkey, I would be terrified. Imagine living your whole life chillaxing in the trees with your sole thought being “heehoo banana” only to be put in a giant metal tube and launched thousands of feet into the air. Should I be more terrified than I am? Anyway, by the time I have finished writing this and have this particular piece uploaded, I will be safely on the ground, because there is no internet in the heavens for poor boys like me.
By Steven Christopher McKnight4 years ago in Journal
Things I'm Doing Instead Of Packing - Letters From Slovakia
At the time of me writing this, I have about 60 hours left until I am put on an airplane and sent zooming out of the United States. That’s 3600 minutes, or 216,000 seconds, and this is what I’m doing instead of—I don’t know—packing for eight months abroad. I’m surprised at how zen I feel, with the weight of everything pressing down on me and all. But whatever. We’re here. We’re calm. We won’t be here in two days. We won’t be calm in two days. We’ll be on a commercial aircraft barreling toward Vienna in two days. Geez. We are calm. How the hell are we calm?
By Steven Christopher McKnight4 years ago in Journal
Tinder Travesties - An Investigation of Chad. Top Story - October 2021.
So, I don’t have much luck on Tinder for a number of reasons. I’m mostly on it just to hold onto the possibility that one day I will be loved (read: get laid). But that’s beside the point. What I will admit is, as a straight guy on Tinder, I don’t run into very many weirdos. Every so often, I find a Republican or an aspiring cop or a woman asking for men over six feet only, and that’s jarring, but that’s more of an IQ thing than a weirdo thing. Men on Tinder need to be bolder. It doesn’t take much for a woman to get a swipe-right on Tinder, but a man? It’s a tough crowd out there, and you gotta use every tool in your arsenal, which is why a lot of men rely heavily on the Tinder bio to set themselves apart from the crowd. Sure, a lot of them are normal, but a lot of them are also very not-normal. That’s where the magic begins, my friends. My friend Val came across the Tinder profile of a gentleman named Chad (not his real name), and I thought that it would be worth it to study his bio and peel apart its layers. What is Chad trying to accomplish? How is he accomplishing it? Is he effective? The answer may surprise you. At the bottom of this article, you can find his full bio, but I think it’s better if you experience Chad one or two sentences at a time, for the sake of dramatic effect. This is going to be an excellent study.
By Steven Christopher McKnight4 years ago in Humans
The Rolling Stones Were Not Cancelled
Recently, the Rolling Stones retired from their concert repertoire the song “Brown Sugar,” citing lyrics that called to mind some slave-based imagery. Cool. I don’t really care all that much. I only listen to two songs by the Rolling Stones with passive regularity, and neither of them are “Brown Sugar.” There was no mainstream public outcry against the Rolling Stones by people of color to get them to stop singing that song. That particular group of old men just decided, “Oh, we feel kind of icky singing this song,” and they decided against it. It’s growth. The Stones, even now, in their old age, are learning and maturing, which is more than you can say about most conservatives. But, this gesture reminds me of something that I can’t seem to outrun: The whole Doctor Seuss controversy last Spring.
By Steven Christopher McKnight4 years ago in Beat
Letters from Slovakia - Pre-Slovakia
So for those of you unfamiliar with my struggle, I am a former student of theater and writing, trying to find a job in either of those fields in a world and economy that is enduring Covid. Neither field in particular is hiring, and to tide me over until those businesses start to recover, I have decided to put my English degree to good use and start teaching English. I spent this past summer working for an English Second Language camp in the beautiful mountains Ukraine, and now I am about to embark on an eight-month contract as a full-time English teacher in a small city in Slovakia. Suffice to say, my brain is going through a lot of things right now.
By Steven Christopher McKnight4 years ago in Journal
I Spent Five Hours Straight On Duolingo
Je ne suis pas une pomme de terre. That is French. I know how to say that sentence in French. But, for the sake of the thought experiment, if I were to go to France or Canada or any other nation where French is widely spoken and say to the locals, “Je ne suis pas une pomme de terre,” they would likely think me another crazy American. Which I am. I can’t argue with that. Anyway, I spent five hours straight learning French on Duolingo. Here’s what I found out about myself.
By Steven Christopher McKnight5 years ago in Education
