Serena Aguirre

The New Roaring '20s

I’m telling you, you don’t understand how a desperate senator, reeling from the loss of his wife, can unite with other desperate senators and governors and leaders so that civilization is inextricably altered and all of a sudden your phone downloads a mandatory “safety” app that pings every time you get within 10 feet of another fucking human being. The pings increase in frequency every foot you draw closer, and once you pass that six foot mark, your phone blares an alarm that makes you miss the days of Amber Alerts.