Pamela Hill

It was never what was in the envelope it was always what was not !

Growing up I always wondered why there were so many secrets and hidden conversation between my siblings and parents . One thing was for certain ( I knew it wasn’t right) . My mother always insisted that we never touched her black marble dresser in her room and that’s one thing we never went against . As an adult I haven’t spoken to my mother in years due to the lies and deceit in the family . I recently decided to forgive my mother because there’s not a manual to raising kids and I know now today we all have our faults but that’s what makes us us! Life is too short for grudges so it’s time to move on. Well last month I visited Ohio to see mom, me my two nieces and my two sisters . When we arrived my dad , mom & uncle sabian my dads brother had been waiting for us to get there! I slept in moms room because the guest room is being fixed and I couldn’t bare sleeping with the girls . Well anyways this night I heard stumbling and I ran to see what it is . My mother and my sister had a huge argument because my sister insisted that it’s time to stop “sweeping things under the rug”. Things got a bit loud but I ignored the facts & issues at hand because it was between them and I headed outside to smoke a cigarette. My sister came out behind me in tears telling me she’s sorry and she wish my mom had told me a long time ago. I asked her what was wrong and why is she so upset let’s talk about it but she refused due to not wanting it to bring any more issues ! Growing up my father was really mean to me and my sister , he was much harder on us than the others and mom never spoke on it . My father and mother always kept their issues private so we weren’t aware of anything . My uncle sabian had been around more then I’ve ever had seen him around in my entire life, oh did I mention he’s my dads brother who my dad hates. My mother never allowed us to get close to him because him and dad couldn’t see eye to eye. So they say. Well later that night we all sat down for dinner and headed to bed like normal . I woke up the next morning ready to head back home after such long weekend and went to pack my things. The girls hugged and kissed the family and we headed out . I had to run back in to get my other bags and mail from a while back so I headed to moms room . “ Mom” I yelled , “where is the mail I had you put to the side “ “Top drawer” she yelled up the steps . I gathered my things grabbed the mail and by mistake grabbed two other pieces in which I assumed were all mine . Got home late the next evening . I scrambled thru the mail and once I got to the last two items I paused . One was a brown envelope with urgent information the other no tag. I called mom to let her know I’ll mail them out to her & that I took two extra pieces of mail by mistake . Oh she panicked , she called me numerous of times afterwards . I didn’t pick up and begin to play back my sisters words . Well I opened the mail and there sat in the brown envelope . My name , My dads name and my moms name. Just say if I never touched that envelope my uncle would’ve never wind up being my father . Oh, you read it right , Sabian Hill and My mother created me and my twin sister and finally decided to stop “sweeping under the rug”. Too little too late now