Martha Wiles
Stories (5)
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Fruitless Tree
She's just sitting there on the edge of the doctor bed, staring into no where with confusion. The nurse knocks on the door of the exam room and says, "Are you ok?". She says yes as she clears her throat, she begins to slide off the exam table as the sanitary paper they rolled across it slides off with her. The plastic table/bed made her thighs sweat a little being against her bare skin and the paper that was between her and the table had to be pealed away. The doctor had just gave Jocelynn the news, she was going to lose this baby as well. It was looking like she was never going to have a baby, this was her 4th miscarriage. She wanted a baby so badly, she couldn't give up. As she's getting dressed she over hears the doctor and the nurse talking, the doctor says to the nurse what sounded like, "wow another one". Jocelynn immediately thinks they are referring to her miscarriages until, the nurse replies, "sixth one this week". She must have just heard the nurse wrong, she was kind of lost at the moment, each miscarriage broke her spirit a little more, she was thirty-three years old and wasn't getting any younger. It didn't make any sense, her menstrual cycle was normal until three years ago. Did this have something to do with her not being able to have a baby? She wondered to herself on her way to the car walking as if she was in a tunnel, not really hearing anything but her own thoughts. She gripped the heart shaped silver locket she was wearing around her neck. It had a picture of her twin sister on one side and herself on the other. Their mother wore it when she was alive, she had died from a virus. In her thoughts was her father saying, "You're just a tree that can't bare fruit, you're still a beautiful tree". It didn't help, his stupid sayings didn't help and she didn't understand, she just wanted her mom she thought as she sat in the car crying out loud in the driver seat. She closed her eyes tight and tried to picture the sunflower high chair she painted and told herself, "It will happen, I will have a beautiful baby one day. Little did anyone know this was the beginning of a new era. Things were changing fast, the normal life Jocelynn wanted back so badly ceased to exist now.
By Martha Wiles5 years ago in Fiction
Standing Out
I'm sitting in my first grade classroom, the year must have been 1984. I remember I took my brush to school because I needed a way to inconspicuously scratch my head while in class. I knew if I scratched my head as often as it itched I would be scratching it all day. I also knew exactly what the problem was because I've experienced this many times before. I didn't want to tell my mom because she would be pissed. So I waited. I waited and tried to hide it for what felt like a week or so until one day it happened. No different than all the other times. The teacher and the school nurse started checking everyone's heads and not to my surprise, I was sent to the office to wait for my mom to pick me up. This is what I feared in the first place, all I had done was prolong it. My mother came into the front office to sign me out and this time I realized why this was such a big deal for my mom. I seen it in her face, she seemed pissed about it because this was as embarrassing for her with the other adults as it was for me with my peers. It all made sense now why she hated it when I got Head Lice and why her anger and other emotions made me feel like it was my fault or like she was mad at me. I had Headlice often, usually when some of my cousins would visit. Every time, the school would send me to the office with headlice, all the other kids knew I had it and never wanted to sit by me or hang out with me at recess. I haven't had headlice sense first grade but do you know the one time my daughter caught it, I had anxiety about it and I even felt upset which to me wasn't warranted. It's funny how something so insignificant can affect us. It's difficult to fit in, when you always stand out.
By Martha Wiles5 years ago in Families
If these plants could talk...
So I'm standing on the coffee table. They were built much sturdier back then. You know made of real wood, not that cheap particle board crap or so my dad would say. Not that the table wasn't cheap, I'm sure we purchased it at a yard sale, thrift store or it was given to us. I was wearing a flag bathing suit meant to look like Wonder Women's costume and my dad had cut me a small piece of rope from his garage to wear on my hip. It was my Magic Lasso of Truth Weapon and I adored it... My mom liked to turn on MTV (music television) so she could listen to music while she cleaned the house and watered her indoor house plants. I remember her singing and talking to her plants, she said to me quite often, " You know Martha Lynn, the plants help us breath, the positive vibrations of your voice, watering them, dusting their leaves and singing to them is what keeps them healthy." My mom had hanging house plants at every house we lived in. She would tack the stems along the wall when they would get to long so they wouldn't get damaged. She loved them plants back then just the same as I love mine today and my son loves his. Back then All I cared about was my MTV, it kept me occupied watching music videos and dancing on the coffee table top. I would jump off yelling things I thought Wonder Women would say, "Don't worry I'll save you, or throw me my Magic Lasso", to my two younger brothers. This is my first memory of really wanting to be something, something big, something important...
By Martha Wiles5 years ago in Motivation
GROWING
I truly believe some people don't know they are responsible for their own happiness, or at least I didn't for most my life. I based my mood on how others treated me or made me feel. I had been in mostly abusive relationships and I was ready to break free from the norm. This was always a scary thought for me because I know I struggle with any change, good or bad. I had been overweight most my life and decided to have a gastric bypass. I've been about 120 pounds lighter and have maintained it for the past 16 years. Once I learned I didn't need other people in order to be happy, I had to find activities and hobbies that helped me make myself happy. I had to work on me.
By Martha Wiles5 years ago in Potent
