Jay Michael Jones
Bio
I am a writer and an avid fan of goats. The two are not mutually exclusive.
Stories (45)
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Sweetgum Wars
I have not Googled to find out the range of the native Sweetgum tree in the United States, but I suspect it is generally restricted to the South. Up north they have snowball fights; out West they chunk dirt clods and in California they sign petitions, I suppose. Here in the Southeast all it takes is rubber tubing and a mess of sweetgum balls for fierce childhood wars to be fought all summer long.
By Jay Michael Jones5 years ago in Humans
The Pearl of the Tri-Pasture Area
I have made mention of the city of Clem, the Pearl of the Tri-Pasture Area, before. It is barely more than a collection of mailboxes now but back in its heyday, the city of Clem was quite the place, boasting of a number of pool halls, a fire station, two grocery stores and a dry goods place. Its tidy streets were carefully laid out by considerate forefathers in the early settlement days of the area.
By Jay Michael Jones5 years ago in Wander
Booyah!
Most of the country is currently in a big natural walk-in freezer, and in many places the temperature is lower than in Denver where I live. As I write this, it is 10:30 in the morning and the outside temperature is -3 degrees without the wind chill. Mind you, no one has to tell me "Yeah but it's (-10 or -20 or -30) here where I live!" because I know, I get that. I am relating MY reality, that is all.
By Jay Michael Jones5 years ago in Motivation
A Matter of Timing
I was setting up a spring seed display in my store the other day when Mrs. Viola Hassendoodle stormed in and knocked the whole display down in her haste to scold me. This is not unusual, as Viola Hassendoodle is something of a bull in a china shop at her best. It is no secret that she and I have been at odds since I moved to Greater Metropolitan Roopville and she certainly was open about it this time.
By Jay Michael Jones5 years ago in Humans
Welcome to Depew
My hometown has a population of around 550 people, not counting cousins who visit extended family members until their earlier transgressions subside enough for them to return home. The population of Depew, Oklahoma, America has neither swollen nor retracted to any noticeable degree over the past fifty years, but I prefer to use the cousin analogy. I would rather spin a story than recite dry facts.
By Jay Michael Jones5 years ago in Wander
The Lion of Clem
At one time Jesse Brassaville was the prize catch of Clem, the Pearl of the Tri-Pasture Area. That was back when he was on the A-string football team at school, had a full mane of glossy golden hair and could make his pecs dance with a few judicious jerks of his hardened chest muscles. It was the apex of his young lion period, the lovely stretch of high school upperclassman years and the entirety of college, when he could glance in the mirror and rest assured his sidewalk strut would be full of confidence for Clem High’s Big Man on Campus. Life was sweet and he was the king of the jungle; the alpha male in his prime.
By Jay Michael Jones5 years ago in Humans
A Drawer Full of Hope
As a child Vanessa liked to visit yard sales with her parents. She became adept at sanding, repairing and restoring worn pieces of furniture. She continued the hobby even as an adult, occasionally coming across bargains that she would never have been able to afford at full price. Vanessa’s online job made it possible for her to rent a bedroom and pay her share of the bills in a house she shared with four other women, and she could buy herself groceries and needed goods, but there was not much left over for extras. She was pleased to be able to support herself but looked forward to saving up enough to indulge in her favorite hobby – restoring old furniture.
By Jay Michael Jones5 years ago in Humans
Dustin Taggerroot Makes Good
Dustin Taggerroot was seventeen when I first met him but he could have been fifty-seven. He was lanky with jumbo-sized joints and a hollow, haggard look that perfectly complemented his sunken eyes, which peered out from beneath his dull straw-like hair. Mean-spirited people might believe at first glance that Dustin was a meth user but that was not true. Dustin’s family is sprinkled with members with jumbo joints and deepset eyes, and many of them are so pasty-faced the little kids have a hell of a time finding the right crayon they need to make a family portrait. I doubt Crayola makes a “Pallor” shade.
By Jay Michael Jones5 years ago in Humans
Merry Extravaganza!
Jim Dimity, Nancy Sweetanall and I waited on the sidewalk for the Greater Metropolitan Roopville Christmas Parade and Extravaganza to begin. It was a beautiful November day, the kind of day folks would have killed for on July 4th. The breeze was brisk but the sun was bright, beckoning people out of the building shadows to stay comfortable. Colorful leaves swirl by in skittish little eddies of wind, adding to the merriment of the occasion.
By Jay Michael Jones5 years ago in Humans
