Brendon

Joined March 2020

44 stories

Stories (44)

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Normal
Normal What is the norm anymore anyway? The census tries to answer that question every 4 years but it’s not really answering it in any meaningful way. It may tell us what average is but what’s the point of knowing averages? So, we can know how far from Jo average we are?
By Brendon6 years ago in Motivation
Where Life Starts to Begin, Again -
I have considered taking anti-depressants before but I have always struggled of the idea of medicating myself. I think that largely stems from being gay for some reason. Coming out as gay is a huge thing, it’s about saying to the world ‘this is who I am, like it or not, this is me, and its Ok to be me’. It’s about saying who I am is OK, so it feels like a bit of a betrayal to have to acknowledge that sometimes who I am is not OK. With chronic as opposed to episodic depression, there is a chemical imbalance within your brain that can’t be chased away with happy thoughts any more than you can pep talk a diabetic pancreas into producing insulin.
By Brendon6 years ago in Psyche
Zack
Zack and I were best friends at school. We met in year 8 after the finger pulling incident. Zack is an attractive ranger (ranger as in orangutang, not as in national parks ranger or council ranger handing out ridiculous parking fines) that kept his body in shape. (I know spherical is a shape, but in this instance, I mean in the shape of a hot well-built man shape) Zack’s parents were divorced and happily so. Zack’s dad had remarried, a Filipino woman named Mika, who was lovely. Mika had two sons of her own, Zayne and Tan. So, Zack had two step brothers.
By Brendon6 years ago in Humans
Lessons in friendship
I've never really had a lot of gay friends but I have had a select few over the years. I’ve always kept my distance because there are parts of gay culture that I really don’t like. Some parts of gay culture are incredibly self-destructive. The back-firing at parents when we struggle with childhood coming out. By the time you come out, you have had often years of getting used to the idea, working out what that means for you, adjusting your picture for your future. Its old news to you, but sometimes it’s out of the left field, brand new information for the rents. They need time to adjust. If they don’t adjust, learn to accept it and love you as you are, they are arseholes of the ugly variety, but good people sometimes need time to process stuff. So many gay people struggle to accept themselves, but demanding instant hand clapping from the people you love as the minimum bar, you set the standard too high for most people to ever meet it. I’m all for standards, but if no-one meets your standards, your standards are the problem and your hurt is of your own making. I also don’t love the bitchy gay queen trope. I do love a bitchy queen, but there is more than one way to be a gay man, and if queening it isn’t you, then the stereotype is just another box you don’t fit. Large groups of gays can become quite negative, bitchy and queenish. I mean, it's all good and fun sometimes, but when its constant, its negative and schoolgirlish. No one but a mean girl wants life to be mean girlish, and there is nothing more tragic than an aging mean girl desperately clinging to her heyday. I think it stems from a place of insecurity, and negative and constrictive cultural ideas about what it is to be a woman or a man or a gay man or whatever. I tend to have a pretty high sex drives, coupled with the inability to accidentally spawn because of a broken condom, as a community we are not great at foreseeing the consequences of fucking all and sundry. No strings attached sex can be a lot of fun, but there comes a time when you want to be more to someone than an orifice. It’s not great for your long-term mental health to see yourself as a cum dumpster instead of a person worth loving and committing to.
By Brendon6 years ago in Humans
The Wooden House -
We were pretty lucky when we were younger, lucky enough to have a holiday house up the coast. It was located at Smiths Lake which was about 20 mins outside of Forster. The suburb was small, probably only a couple of football fields that was surrounded by a lake. One way in, and one way out. Mother and father had purchased a block of land that was on a vertical slant of 45 degrees that led up the hill into the forest. Smith’s lake would have bored the crap out of any high schooler. There was the lake to swim in, and a coffee shop and that was it. My sister and I ran up and down the coffee shop, disturbing anyone unfortunate enough to be there at the time, but that was all the excitement to be found at Smiths Lake.
By Brendon6 years ago in Motivation
Hair, Masculinity & the Gay Man –
Katie and I can dive into some pretty weird conversations. It's just what happens when two fascinating, intelligent glorious human beings have a meeting of minds. To less enlightened beings with no imagination, our conversations may at first appear shallow or comical. Smarter people, like my devoted readers here will recognise their potential brilliance and philosophical value right away. If conversations were roads, our conversations are roads not found on google maps. The destination may appear unclear but you don’t find your way to the end of the rainbow by typing Dee Why RSL into the satnav. Our conversations, the philosophies we nut out via messenger conversations that start out about stuff like dicks and balls, but diverge into universal truths, one day they are going to change the world. I see a Netflix series in our future, a bit like series 8, but better. Us sitting on inflatable unicorns extracting philosophical truths about life and the universe from discussions about penis piercings, anal douching, STD scares and other unexpected topics. Hilarious, seductive and educational to boot. Somebody start a petition and make it happen.
By Brendon6 years ago in Humans
The 30th that proved right
I hit my 30th with true drunken Dionysus style. Probably more Dionysian than strictly necessary, but it was a dream 30 years in the making, so it needed to be epic. I had two hot ass bartenders wearing speedos, because I deserve to objectify hot men on my birthday. One was a bartender I met at my farewell drinks from KRONOS, the other was his mate who was a model. I propositioned Mark at the Ivanhoe, and he said he would be happy to walk around my house half naked and serve drinks at my 30th, for a price of course. After that it just felt so unnecessary to go online looking for hot wait staff for hire, only for them to turn up looking like the elephant man’s less attractive younger brother. That’s the problem with online these days. With all the filters and stuff, a photo can be a bit deceptive. On a related note, what counts as hot these days can be a bit confusing. I blame the body positivity movement. I am all for people loving themselves just the way they are, but that doesn’t mean my penis has to agree with your self-assessment of your own hotness. No amount of social engineering is going to change the basics of mainstream attractiveness. Sure, there will always be people with specific fetishes, if bed bound morbidly obese people light your fire, no shame in that, go get your tubby lover. There are plenty of people out there who are into amputees, but the reality is most people are programmed to prefer symmetry. The reality is the vast majority of people are not going to be into non-mainstream, you can shriek on social media about how beautiful you are, and to someone you will be, but that doesn’t mean I want you in speedos serving cocktails at my party.
By Brendon6 years ago in Families
Charles’s 30th
Charles is one of my best mates and there has been plenty of ups and downs like any friendship. I guess the important thing is we both came out on top and are still closer than ever. Charles and I became friends through my Uni friends that I had met earlier on in the year. We all went to University and studied various subjects, but we all interconnected at some point along the way. Ali and I did Education studies together as well as Anthropology 101, and Kadin joined us in our Anthropology 101 class. Lafonda-green had classes with both Eden and Kadin. Thus, through a series of lucky coincidences, the group was formed.
By Brendon6 years ago in Humans
The Lion, The Witch & The Wardrobe
‘Ask me a question, and I’ll tell you no lies.’ I was in a relationship with a guy called Jordan. After I was fired from my job in the cafe, I wasn’t too worried because I had plenty of savings and not too many bills. With 15K in savings and rent only $100 a week, I wasn’t too stressed about finding a job. Yes, my canny readers, you saw this one coming, I went through my savings a lot quicker than expected. It turns out having champagne tastes and a high maintenance loafer for a partner costs a lot of money. Some things are an acquired taste, but I took to sitting on the couch all day like a duck to water. I think I was born to be a sugar baby, so any rich daddies looking for a man to lavish your affections and money on for very little in return, I’m a natural. As the one doing the sugar daddying, yeah, it’s not my strong point. I applied for jobs off and on but didn't turn up to half the interviews. It’s hard to find the motivation to get back on your feet when you have a partner with no drive or motivation. Jordan never encouraged me to get back out there. Looking back, I now realise, for Jordan, I was just a meal ticket, and I was just too naïve to see it at the time. Jordan was my first love and despite hindsight showing me how dysfunctional it was, he still holds a big place in my heart.
By Brendon6 years ago in Humans
Drugs, Sex & All of the Above -
Most people I know have dabbled in illicit substances. Smoked the happy weed, sniffed the nose candy, and ingested the love pills, whatever the term kids are using these days. It’s funny how the terms change but the practices remain with each new generation thinking they invented a new kind of rebellion. It’s like the word bonk or the even more offensive boink. My parents bonked, their parents shagged, my generation is somehow more puritan and over-sexed than our predecessors. We ‘get intimate’ and ‘hook-up’. It seems like a deceptively polite way to describe letting a stranger plow you from behind in an alleyway behind a club, but language is strange like that.
By Brendon6 years ago in Filthy
Does Love Conquer All?
Love and impulse, do the two go together? Of course, they do. I’m two weeks into my current love story and despite not feeling very optimistic about it, there is ample evidence of the ridiculously impulsive things I do in pursuit of love. My love story begins with a 20min rendesvous in an airport toilet. We waved to each other from escalators heading in opposite directions at 3 in the morning. Isn’t that how all great love stories start? I’m sure if Shakespeare was alive today, he would be writing stories about strangers fucking in airport toilets, then sending WhatsApp videos of themselves jerking-off and hoping for something better. Its Romeo and Romeo for the modern romantic.
By Brendon6 years ago in Humans
Burning bridges
Paul and I went to an Adam Lambert concert. I feel the need to make this point, I was an unwilling participant, there against my will, forced into attending because no-one else would. After the concert, we headed to an Oxford Street gay club, and that is where Paul met Seth.
By Brendon6 years ago in Humans