Woodpeckers against humans, flight or fight?

Reports have been heard recently about the most idiosyncratic and newfound situation of the notable woodpeckers. According to our sources, our feathery little friends have complained of constant headaches. Finally, after much turmoil in the laboratories, the specialists found the real reason for the headaches. the woodpeckers are enduring from migraines due to their constant pecking. As a result, most of the elderly population of these birds have decided to "retire from their jobs" and fly across to the polar regions for recreational purposes.

Furthermore, the most unusual and unheard-of situation occurred when the woodpecker flock is asking the government for their respective claims on their "hard-earned money". On questioning one of the elder leaders of the flock, he said, "We have worked our beaks off for so many timespans for the timber framers and wood industry, and hence, rightfully claim upon our 'life insurances'. We have just been diagnosed with such a grave health issue, and therefore have decided to retire and claim that is rightfully and legitimately ours." The insurance companies along with the government have made numerous fruitless attempts to explain to the birds that only humans are entitled to the privileges like "life insurances", and the birds won't be getting anything at all. Extremely enraged and indignant upon the retorts received, the woodpeckers have conducted various protests and talon campaigns, ultimately resolving to threaten to peck all the "human wooden stuff" they can find unless their above-said demands are met, along with some allowance money and accommodating retreats as long as these retired birds fly high in the sky.