UNNAMED

UNNAMED

Not all awakenings are gentle.

Some tear you from borrowed dreams and drop you into a body that doesn't feel like yours.

This is how her story begins — not with a memory, but with a wound.

Chapter-1 DREAM

It was hazy. I couldn’t see anything. After a while, when the weariness wore off, I looked through the window and saw twilight. It was beautiful. For a moment, I thought it might be evening—or maybe morning. I couldn’t decide. The sky was a faded blue, streaked with cherry hues from the sun’s rays. It felt blinding, and as I tried to shield my eyes, I noticed crimson on my wrist.

“It’s beautiful,” I whispered to myself.

Suddenly, a surge of emotions overwhelmed me. I wanted to scream. I wanted to scream so loudly that the pain inside me would burst free. But no sound came from my mouth. All I could do was cry—cry until my breathing grew ragged, and the ache in my throat became unbearable. There were too many thoughts racing through my mind and, at the same time, none at all.

The winter air gave me chills. I used to love winter; I can’t say the same now. I used to love the color blue, but I’m not sure anymore. I’m not sure what I love or what I don’t.

“It’s safe here,” I murmured to myself as I lay down again. “I’m safe here.” I repeated it like I was sure of it. But no matter how many times I said it, I couldn’t believe it. And then, I realized—no matter how many times you repeat a lie, it will never become true.

“True? Lie? Aren’t truth and lies the same thing? Aren’t they just sentences we twist to suit our needs?”

“Shut up!” I screamed at myself. “Will you just shut up?”

“Why? Why should I?” a voice inside me retorted.

“Because I want you to stop. Don’t say another word!”

“What makes you think I’ll listen to you?”

My head felt like it was bound to explode. The pain was unbearable. I wanted rest. I wanted sleep.

“Aren’t you resting already?” the voice sneered. “Lying here like a lazy fool when you should be working. You didn’t sleep because you didn’t want to, and I didn’t stop you. No one did. You decided it yourself. So why are you complaining now?”

“I know, I know! Now shut up. I don’t want to hear your voice anymore. Disappear!” I said, clutching my head.

“There you go again, acting like a victim when you’re not. You love me—I was always there for you, and I’ll always be with you. You know it. No one else can stay with you except me.”

“No! You’re lying. I’m not acting, and if you were always with me, then why did you lie to me? Why?”

“Oh, my little girl, so you’ve accepted that I was with you all along. Finally, you see it.”

“Yeah, so why did you lie? Why did you lie?”

“How can you question me? Aren’t you a liar yourself? A moment ago, you told me to disappear, and now you’re talking to me like an old friend. Why is that? Do you want me to disappear, or do you want me to stay? Say it, my little girl.”

“Sto—stop. Stop it. I want you to disappear. Just disappear!”

“My little girl, you are safe. Take a deep breath. You are safe. You want me, right? Without me, you’ll be nothing. You know that, don’t you, my baby?”

“Go away! Stop calling me that. I don’t want you here.”

“You want me.”

“No, I don’t.”

“Don’t lie to yourself.”

“I’m not.”

“You are.”

“I’m not!”

“Oh, my love, calm down. Can’t you see? I’m you, and one can’t lie to themselves.”

“No—no, you’re not me.”

“I am. I’m your true self.”

“You’re just a hypocrite. I’m not a drop like you. You’re not me.”

“Ah, hypocrite. You said it right. I’m a hypocrite because I’m you.”

“Shut up! Shut up! Go away! I don’t want you. Go away. Disappear!”

The voice trailed off into unintelligible murmurs.

I opened my eyes again. Another blackout. I didn’t know why it happened, and I didn’t want to know. I just wanted it to stop. That voice—it was like molten glass. It hurt, but it was oddly pleasing. Yes, it hurt, but it wasn’t a lie. That’s why it sounded comforting. And once again, I found solace in the pain.

What a weird dream. Though it didn’t feel like a dream. Whose voice was that? I’ve heard it a thousand times, but I can’t figure out whose it was. It’s frustrating. My head is pounding.

I thought it might be better to go outside for some fresh air. As I stepped outside, the breeze made me feel alive, though it was chilling. The wind filled my lungs, and my body began to freeze. It felt good. For a moment, my mind cleared. I sat down near the railing, holding it like a child, looking at the sky. “It’s beautiful,” I whispered to myself. The stars were twinkling, their beauty unmatched, and I just stared at them. I couldn’t feel my left hand, but I kept looking at the stars, thinking it was just the cold making it freeze.

Without noticing, time passed. The birds came to greet the morning. So it is morning, I sighed.

“Gotta go, Mr. Bird,” I said, standing still. My hand felt numb, and I finally looked at it. It was bright red, blood dripping down slowly, though steadily.

I heard noises from the other side of the door. My heart started racing, thinking it was my mother coming to wake me up. Panic set in. I removed my T-shirt, wrapping the scar with a piece of cloth, then put on another T-shirt and a jacket. My hand ached, like needles pressing into my skin. I opened the door and saw my mother a few steps away.

She said in a sleepy voice, “You woke up. I came to see you. Will you take care of breakfast? I’m not feeling well.”

“Sure, mother,” I said, trying to sound normal. I felt like a thief, about to be caught, but saved by luck.

“You rest. I’ll take care of everything. You don’t need to worry about anything,” I said, gently guiding her to her room.

“Wake your brother up when you call me for breakfast,” she said before disappearing from my sight.

I felt relieved and started walking towards kitchen. She said me to do some work the night passed

- to be continued...

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Genres: Psychological Horror, Dark Fiction, Self-Harm, Suicidal Themes, Psychological Thriller

Tags: #UNNAMED #originalnovel #darkfiction #psychologicalhorror #nebulasworld #fiction #selfdiscovery #thriller