Stepping Inside Self

Self-love is the road toward healing. These prompts are an invitation to step inside yourself. Rupi Kaur

Growing up in an alcoholic/addicted family, I didn't understand self-love. I heard it referred to negatively. "Well, he sure loves himself!" Today I know that's more narcissism. Self-love is not at the expense of others.

Self-love is treating ourselves with compassion, and kindness in much the same way we treat a good friend.

Rupi Kaur's Self-Love Writing Prompts - What makes you a good friend?

Some of the friends I have had for over 40 years are more like sisters than just friends. When my sister-friend Mary's husband died, I decided to stick closer to her, even though we don't live that close. I could call and check in and I have.

Many times she would say, "How did you know I needed to talk/cry?" I invite her to functions I am going to and she will invite me as well. We had a blast at a local food shelf fundraiser that she invited me to in a town closer to me than her.

Another sister-friend I take the time to listen to her when she is struggling with a granddaughter, who has a chronic and persistent mental illness condition. I don't try to solve her problem; she knows as much as I do and I know she needs to talk it through.

We continue to do some work together and when together we can talk and laugh and share meals.

Another friend and I live farther apart and we don't see each other often, but we still stay in touch through social media and the phone.

I know by talking to her if something is up. And she can do the same with me. I am supportive on the phone and in person. I went through her daughter's entire funeral process with her sitting next to her the entire time.

I have friends that live close and I see them at support groups and community functions. I can call on any of them when I need or require support.

Many of my recovery friends have become family. Always there if I need them. Then there are friends I have known from high school. Not as many but some that I still consider good friends.

What is difficult is when a good friend dies. I am at the age where that can and does happen.

Rupi Kaur's Self-Love Writing Prompts - Some ways I could have more fun in life are ______________.

Stop working and just play! I think I am afraid I would get bored. And who would I play with as my husband is always so busy doing what he does. We take time to ride my motorcycle and I enjoy that and have fun when riding. I always have for the 30+ years I have ridden.

We camp with family and friends occasionally. We could do more of that. I love spending time with grandchildren and most of the time they are there camping too. Even some of the teens and young adults. Fun, fun. I love our grandchildren and great-grandchildren!

In my younger years I would downhill ski, golf, attend movies at the theatre, plays, and concerts, camp in the BWCA, and travel to Texas and New Mexico to see family. Those were some of the fun things I did.

Then later I visited my daughter in Alaska. She and her husband live close now as do their 8 children.

For my birthday this year, I took a trip with 3 of my children and we had a blast. Something we hope to do each year. The photo above reminded me of that trip. I believe that I have always done fun things and still do.

I have fun at work too. I don't always want to go but once there I have a a great time most days!

Rupi Kaur's Self-Love Writing Prompts - The last time I had a good cry was ______________.

My crying has been okay for many years. Once I could get rid of some of the old messages, like "You are a big girl now" and the idea that I couldn't let anyone know I was weak as they would take advantage of me.

And the "Cry and I will give you something to cry for." I don't remember that being said to me but I heard it.

I can sit and have the tears running down my face and it is okay. Pretty much anywhere. I saw a politician's son crying and I was so pleased at how that young man could do that and not try to stop them or cover up but rather cheer on his father.

My tears started to run and that was okay.

I think a good cry is more like an ugly cry. Not the ugly cry that is happy tears but rather the ugly cry when someone we love dies or there is a break up in a relationship or someone leaves us. I have had plenty of those too.

In the photo above that little girl's t-shirt doesn't fit her mood at the time. I am guessing that is still another kind of cry. Mad tears or angry tears. Maybe sad tears. Sometimes we don't have the words to express what we are feeling and tears will do that for us.

Tears are healing and I know that and I will let them flow!