Self-Love

Self love is the road toward healing. These prompts are an invitation to step inside yourself. Rupi Kaur

I am not sure about these writing prompts. I do believe self-love is what healing is about, as in loving ourselves it makes it possible to forgive others and to live life. I will do my best with these, but I found the gratitude prompts easier.

Photo by Annie Spratt on Unsplash

Rupi Kaur’s Self-love Writing Prompts — A time when I was underestimated but came out on top was _________________.

When I had cancer, the cancer was a fluid from my stomach that moved around my lungs making it so I couldn’t breathe and it resulted in a respiratory code.

Some doctors thought they might have to operate on my lungs and an oncologist started chemotherapy and draining the liquid. Because of having cancer the oncologist won out.

The cancer I was treated for is a type that is “Treatable, probably not curable.” I am eleven years out from chemotherapy. The treatment was hard on me as was the respiratory code and being kicked into menopause. All of which gave me memory problems.

Many family and friends visited before treatment, during treatment, and as I was recuperating. I was told by my nieces that their parents thought it was important to see me now. That told me that my family didn’t think I would make it through.

At 70, I don’t know how long I have. I have other health issues that I handle. It doesn’t matter to me how long I live as long as I know my husband will be by my side no matter what.

I heard my husband tell my family that he watched me go through cancer and recovery in a way he never thought possible. He was impressed.

Even though I go for regular checkups, and do the extra things for prevention, I expect to die one of these days as we all will. I want to enjoy every day and having had cancer gave me that. I wish to live until I die and that is how I believe I came out on top!

Rupi Kaur’s Self-love Writing Prompts — Right now, I am afraid of __________ because ___________.

Right now, I am afraid of having to have open heart surgery, because I just saw the cardiologist on Tuesday. He ordered more tests and increased one of my medications. I have trouble with the mitral valve in my heart and I have AFIB or atrial fibrillation.

I have had two balloon valvuloplasty's. The last in 2020. What I tell myself is that doesn’t mean anytime soon. The test will determine if it is necessary and when an intervention is needed.

And just like the cancer returning, I don’t have to worry about that today. I have learned to live one day at a time and to tackle only today. Today we are going to visit our children a few hours away. The oldest two sons and the youngest.

We are having dinner tonight together and just hanging out at my son’s house. We are probably playing cards, as we all love to do that together. It is good for laughs. Our youngest birthday is on the 21st and he will be 46, but he has plans, so we will celebrate this weekend.

It was his idea. He planned the weekend, and the menu, bought the food, plans to cook, and is making up the beds. What a guy!

We are leaving this morning to spend time with the oldest son and his grandchildren, or our great-grandchildren before we go for dinner, just down the road at the son whose birthday it is.

I am looking forward to spending the day on the pontoon tomorrow with my children and a few grandchildren.

Rupi Kaur’s Self-love Writing Prompts — Have you ever felt like you abandoned yourself? How did you find your way back?

This would happen regularly during the first couple of years of my son's life. My son quit breathing when he was one month old. He was studied and the doctor in intensive care decided what he probably had was sudden infant death syndrome. (SIDS)

They said he could quit breathing anytime for up to age two and a half. I believed I had to abandon myself for my baby. I couldn’t sleep when he was sleeping. I was on a vigil to make sure he didn’t stop breathing.

At about age two, we discovered he was allergic to smoke. My husband was a smoker and every once in a while, he would quickly pass him off to me as he said, “I think he is not breathing right!”

His dad no longer smoked in the house. I quit smoking when pregnant. After a month, I thought what is smoking a bit of marijuana going to harm. It was a nightmare. I was in the hospital all night and I didn’t know if he would live or not.

On the 21st of this month, my baby turns 46. I believed it was my fault that happened to my baby, so therefore my life had to be put on hold to do the very best I could for him.

When I got into recovery soon after, I was told in many ways that I wasn’t taking care of myself and for my sake and my children’s I needed to pay attention to myself. In my first year, I was told to start selling Avon and with that, I should use the product.

Sometime within the first year of his life, we moved and I was told I should sell Mary Kay. I had never heard anyone else say that they should sell cosmetics to feel better but it worked for me. I felt like I was slowly taking myself back with the help of recovery and working with others.

~~~~

First published by Mercury Press on medium.com