Looking back to where it all began is not a great time to think about. Let's just say my life was full of sadness. Picture not being able to speak your mind and express your feelings or emotions. So here we are in a child-filled world full of mean and evil wicked people with no where to escape the horror of every day life. I am a small person and am not able to make my own life decisions. I wouldn't wish the life that I had on anyone. We come into this world with no sense of what life is truly supposed to be like. I'm dealing with this trigger on a daily basis. My heart is broken, and I wonder if it will ever feel whole again. You were crying about things that you were supposed to cry about, and you treated me like I wasn't yours. I was mocked, teased, and given all kinds of names. Who put such fear in such a young little person's life? As far back as elementary school, I played basketball. I kind of found love when we adopted my brother when he was five months old. My brother was the joy of my life. He was my happy place. I can remember when my brother caught pneumonia. I would stay up with my baby brother. As time goes I ended up once I enter into Junior High school a live in babysitter I took care of the housekeeping duties as if I were an adult in the house. I grew up really fast, but I was a fast-tail girl. All I remember is me taking care of my two sisters's and my brother's. Fear is something that no one should put in their child's life. As I approached high school, it wasn't any better. I even had an aunt who would threaten to beat me if I didn't get a switch to beat my cousin. What is going on with those who feel the need to beat anyone, child or adult? My high school year was when I kind of felt a little bit more power. I was really smart in school. I remember that my dad would drive me to school. I would have to get up to fix his lunch for work. Everyone else would be sleeping. So as the year goes on, I would either take the transportation home bus or occasionally my mom would pick me up from school. My dad would give me money to catch the bus home, and I started saving the money to run away from home. I did a total of five to six throughout my high school years. But I would go to people's houses that my mom knew. My dad's mom kept me hidden out in her home for fourteen, or twenty-one, days. The last time this happened, I was beat by my oldest and mom. My dad never knew because it would always happen. Why won't he be at work? It even got so bad that I couldn't go to school because I was forced to take care of my younger siblings and the children that my mom babysat for. My dad was told that I was sick and wouldn't be going to school. Remember when my dad took me to school? I entered the eleventh grade, which was the grade in which I was able to go to school. I didn't have any hope. at all, so I lost all interest until I turned eighteen years old and met the man of my dreams. He took me away from my abusers and attackers.
About the Creator
SCREAM TO BE SEEN
In my life, there have been hard aches and pains. Sometimes I wonder if I could get past any of the past trauma. Picture this as a baby growing inside a mother's womb. You feel the kicks, and you feel the joy of knowing that you are blessed to have such precious moments of joy as becoming a mom or parent. Well, in my life, I was born into hate, hurt, pain, and not feeling like no one ever loved me, so this is why I am sharing my story. Here we go. How far back can you remember? Mmmm, great question, me as far back as 1 year old. Really, yes, really, I was born in January of 1966. And I would always have nightmares, and I can remember waking up crying or afraid. Well, as time went on, it was my last thought—about my life, but as a child, we can't understand what the feels or emotions of the dreams are. But as time and years went on, things started happening to me. Horrible and bad things, such as physical abuse and sexual contact with family members, were now done by my mom and older sister, and sexually by my sister and boy cousins. My dad always worked. None of the abuse came from him, my father, that is, but I know that abuse comes in different ways. My dad was never home due to having multiple jobs, so I guess some were neglected. I took her frustration out on three of the five children: my oldest sister, myself, and my sister under me. We're our dad's children, not my youngest sister or brother. So as time went on, I no longer wanted to be at home, so I ran away, thinking that things would change, but they only got worse. I was tortured with telephone receivers and sent to bed hungry because I didn't speak up. I felt like I didn't have a voice. I was afraid, scared, and feeling like I no longer wanted to live. Who does this to an amazing, obedient child? Anyone who is sick mentally themselves has been beat by mistake. My oldest would do something, but I got beat, and my oldest would tell the truth that it wasn't me. I hated my life. I'm finding out more things in my life now that I'm 58 years old. The chapter in my book was a plan that God had for me. My plan, I believe, is to be married, have children, and become a motivational speaker. I believe this is my purpose, so as I'm starting this new chapter in my life, I have been thinking a lot because I talk and share things with my doctor's children and others who are going through the same or similar situations. I wouldn't wish this pain on anyone. I live it daily. Past trauma is so hard, especially for those who truly don't have mental support. It is much needed. I feel like a baby in an adult body that is still running away. Please seek help. Please don't suffer in silence, because it will consume you. I hope that my story motivates and inspires you to get help speaking up. Tell someone that I feel your pain. It hurts me daily to know, and I am still seeking multiple ways of healing from my past trauma. Scream, talk loudly, and open up. Don't shut down. Teach, preach, and speak until you feel that you are where you want to be in your life. After all, we only live once. Let's start grieving to heal.
By MONALISA 2 years ago in Confessions
It's Winter
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By Denise E Lindquist22 days ago in Writers
Working To Find Work
Working To Find Work: How College Graduates Are Struggling for Employment By Jonathan Mandel 14 January 2026 Historically, college graduates have enjoyed higher employment rates than their high school graduate counterparts. This seemed like an obvious occurrence: Having gone through the rigors of higher education, recent college graduates have historically been granted greater, more lucrative access to the labor market due to their advanced degree.
By Jonathan Mandel6 days ago in Writers
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Hello welcome to my story of my actually life story. I hope that you find it all as a start on your personal life journey ✨️