Getting Out of the Routine

You are a Badass Deck, by Jen Sincero — It’s time to get mighty clear about what makes you happy and what makes you feel the most alive, and then create it instead of pretending you can’t have it.

The cards in this deck were created from a book You Are a Badass: How to Stop Doubting Your Greatness and Start Living an Awesome Life.

Getting clear about what makes me happy is a great goal while responding to these prompts. Some things are clearer! Others not so much. I am not halfway through this badass card deck, so I’m hopeful it will be obvious by the end of the cards what makes me most happy and alive.

Get Out Of Your Routine — Talk to strangers, wear something different, go to a new grocery store, make dinner for someone who you want to get to know better, change toothpaste, go to a movie at 2 p.m., learn three new jokes, walk taller, notice five awesome things you’ve never noticed about your home, your beliefs, your mother, your face. Do things that pull you out of your routine and you’ll be amazed by the new realities that were there all along that suddenly present themselves. Jen Sincero

Getting out of my routine:

Talk to strangers: As an elder, I have noticed that I always talk to strangers. I enjoy it. Some people are not comfortable with that while others put up with me and still others appear to enjoy our conversations.

Wear something different: I have worn something different since I retired. Everyday clothes rather than dress casual, that I wore for work. Then I had go to court clothes and a few dressy outfits. I still have most of them and I have worn out many of my casual clothes so will need to buy some new everyday clothes.

Go to a new grocery store: Since the husband’s retirement 12 years ago now, and having moved, all of our grocery stores have changed. There is Aldi’s, then Target and Walmart, Super One, and Fred’s just down the road from us.

And there is a health food store going in within the next few years. That is what I probably miss the most about the grocery stores we left behind.

Make dinner for someone who you want to get to know better: We have invited a cousin and a few single friends over but we have not followed through with that since we invited. I think they are waiting for a more solid invite.

Change toothpaste: A couple of years ago now, I changed toothpaste to a toothpaste that doesn’t have fluoride.

Go to a movie at 2 p.m.: Since we moved up north there are no movies at 2 p.m. except kids movies on the weekend. When living in the big city, I did this all of the time. I have had a life's worth of matinees!

Learn three new jokes: I am not good at jokes. I have learned one at a time and then I wear that one out, until most people I know have heard it. Native American humor is different too, so I try to keep that in mind. Maybe the trick is to learn 3 new jokes.

When reading recovery joke books, I haven’t found enough funny yet to memorize 3, which is sad. It is important for recovering people to laugh.

Walk taller: When I began to shrink — like going from 5'7.5" I hated that. Now, I am 5'5.34" and growing shorter. The shrinking woman. Because of this, I purposely watch my posture and walk taller!

Notice five awesome things you’ve never noticed about your home: When we moved up north, we moved a double-wide mobile home with us.

I planned to build a log cabin on the land my husband had already purchased. We had both taken a log cabin building class in our youth because we both thought it would be cool to live in one.

Then I got cancer, and I could then care less about what we lived in. We have heat, AC, dishwasher, washer and dryer, and a fireplace. We have bird feeders outside my kitchen window. We both have an office space.

We can host 20+ people and we have done that a few times at a holiday. The rest of the time it is usually much fewer. We are crowded a bit but wouldn’t a one-bedroom with a loft be more crowded?

There was a concern that the double-wide was made in 1989 and that is older. I liked it when I moved in back in 1997 and I still like it. I’m sure it could use some new windows and some decoration changes and furniture upgrades but for today it is fine.

We have a huge yard with lots of space for flower gardens, a campsite, a go-kart track, a firing range, places to ride 4-wheelers, and snowmobiles. I’m good! My husband says he is living his dream! Such a kid! We are good!

Your beliefs: God, Creator, Giizheymanido, Giizheymanidokwe! Native American culture. Stories, two medicines, the medicine wheel, 7 grandfathers.

Your mother: I loved my mother, and she died in 2009. She was my biggest cheerleader and taught me so much about our culture ways. She had a great sense of humor and kept me laughing. I miss her!

Your face: at 70, the wrinkles are apparent. I don’t wear makeup unless I am going out. Getting out of my routine would be applying makeup when staying at home. Looking more presentable for both my husband and me.

You are responsible for what you say and do. You are not responsible for whether or not people freak out about it. Jen Sincero

When we retired, I needed to get used to having date nights without going out. I understand that now and don’t mind most of the time unless I would like to see something or go somewhere in particular.

Then I learned that I can do that, it doesn’t have to mean dragging the hubby out. Or getting upset because he would rather stay at home. A girlfriend will join me. It doesn’t matter if anyone freaks out about it.

One night my mom was staying with us and she and I went to a movie and we were at a steak house for dinner. She asked me what John was having for dinner and I responded by telling her that he was going to eat cold cereal.

I found myself justifying what and why and quickly stopped when I realized that I am responsible for what I say and do and not for someone freaking out about it.

If I had felt responsible we would have taken him a steak dinner and we didn’t. He was happy with his dinner. We grew up in different eras and there were many things that she didn’t do because of when she grew up.

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First published by Mercury Press on medium.com