Don’t say the letter after H and before J

How does one avo-, no can’t say that. How does one not say the letter after H and before J? That letter cannot eas-. Ok that was close. That letter can be hard to not say when you are try- umm, when there's a challenge that makes you not use the letter for at least one thousand words or more. A crazy amount of words use that letter. A lot of them…. The task certa- umm def- no umm the task cannot be completed unless you use extreme care and have a strong vocabulary,

So why would the author of the present story undertake such a challenge? Why would he want to do such a task? Well for the potent- damn, umm, for the chance at a reward and glory of course! Also for the challenge and for the chance to expand the author’s ab- umm sk- no umm, forget that thought. No, hang on, the reason’s to expand the author’s vocabulary! (The author refuses to comment on the rumor that that letter’s actually broken on the author’s keyboard!)

So, what do you say for 1,000 words when you cannot say that dreaded letter? A letter that’s extremely common and hard to not use. Well, you can actually say a great many th- umm, you can say many sentences and paragraphs. For example:

- Would you please help me clean my house Mr. Jeacocke? My fam- umm my spouse and my ch- umm my spawn are mov- umm have gotten a new home that we need to put our stuff at. We would love your help today!

- Why are you even here at work on a Saturday? You have the day off and should enjoy your “break” because you worked the last seventeen days and work the next twelve!

- You can even say: What are the best words you know Mr. Gregor Szymankowszczyzna? But those words cannot use one of the letters of the alphabet. Yes, the letter that you cannot use cannot be found as part of your name, even though pretty much every other letter’s used by your name!!

- Why on Earth would someone agree to do a challenge that makes you not use a letter? Even more so when the letter you cannot use can be found as part of and used by so many words. And the letter's found as part of so many extremely common and hard to not use words at that! A person would have to be crazy to agree to do that!!

- The cat named Matt has seven hats and lots of body fat from all the tuna he eats every day. Matt loves tuna and salmon and bass and even carp. Really he just loves to eat all the food he can get.

- How many of these sentences can you create? Do you have any thoughts? No, really, some help would be great!

- Dear, what’s on the TV today? Any good shows to watch? No? There’s never any good shows on anymore… The olden days of TV were so much better. They don’t make shows that way anymore. The new ones are nowhere near as good as the ones they used to make.

- How many more of these sentences are there to create? Well, hopefully, there are a lot! Because there are a few hundred words left to say before the challenge can be done! The challenge takes longer to complete than the author thought at the outset.

- The brown fox jumped over the lazy yellow dog at full speed and scared the dog. The dog ran away and the fox ate the dog’s food. The fox has been known to be a jerk and loves to steal food from others.

- Once upon a, no sorry can’t use that famous phrase, the bad letter’s part of the phrase. Ummm, ‘Twas a dark and stormy late afternoon when all of a sudden a ghost appeared to two teens named Fred and Amber. Unfortunately, the rest of the story has been forgotten by those who were there.

- How many sentences can you create that meet the rules of the challenge? Could you share some? ;)

- Long ago there was a queen that ruled over a land of mag-, umm a land of great wonder that was home to a great many supernatural creatures and unusual phenomena. However, the land was also home to forces that frequently sought to wreak havoc and sow chaos throughout the land. Fortunately, there was a hero that, through the help of others, rose up and defeated these forces. After much effort, peace was restored. At least for now…

- Do you know that the language used by the challenge has over 1,000,000 words, although the exact number’s unknown? How many of them have the banned letter could not be found out through a Google search.

- When the thugs came to our town, they caused havoc but were eventually repelled by a group of heroes. We were all very and eternally grateful to these regular folk turned heroes that saved us all!

- No number before the number 1,000 has the letter A, the Pope cannot be an organ donor, the longest concert ever was 453 hours long, and you cannot hold your nose and also hum.

Ok, the task keeps gett- umm won’t stop be- umm the task appears to be harder and harder the more sentences that get typed. The author’s runn- umm… the author can no longer formulate sentences fast. The task was easy when the challenge started but now the task has become hard. There cannot be many more sentences that meet the rules of the challenge, are there?

Well, for better or for worse (and that’s up to the reader!), the deed’s been done. Over 1,000 words have been used and there has been no usage of that dreaded letter! So many sentences have needed to be deleted because that letter was used, but fortunately the author caught them before the story was completed. The story may not be perfect, but at the end of the day, my story successfully completed the challenge. Hopefully the present author succeeds at and gets an award from the related challenge!!!