Dialogue Tags: Said Is Not Dead

“Good dialogue is invisible; bad dialogue waves its arms and screams.”

Let’s talk about one of the most hotly debated topics in writing communities, especially if you hang around TikTok or writers’ forums: dialogue tags. You’ve seen it, right? The endless discourse about whether we’re allowed to use anything other than said. Spoiler: you are. But also… you don’t have to.

This isn’t a call to banish murmured, snarled, or whispered from your vocabulary. This is about balance, rhythm, and understanding why said works — and when it doesn’t.

🗨️ The Power of “Said”

Here’s the thing about said: it’s invisible. Your readers’ eyes glide right over it. It doesn’t interrupt the flow, doesn’t draw attention, doesn’t make them pause and reconsider what’s happening.

Take this:

“I can’t believe you did that,” she said.

It’s seamless, clean, and effective. The focus stays on the words, not the delivery.

But swap it for something louder:

“I can’t believe you did that,” she screeched.

Suddenly the tag dominates the moment. Sometimes that’s fine. Sometimes you want to highlight the emotional weight. But do it too often and you risk pulling readers out of the scene.

Said is your friend. It’s a reliable background character who does their job perfectly — quietly.

🔄 When Variety Works

Here’s where nuance comes in. Tags beyond said aren’t evil. In fact, they can be powerful when used sparingly. The problem is when they become crutches.

If every character “hisses,” “snarls,” “growls,” and “shouts” on every page, it gets exhausting. But sprinkle them with intention, and they add colour, texture, and emotional depth.

For example:

“I hate you,” he whispered.

That one word changes the mood entirely. Same line, different weight.

So yes, you can absolutely use other tags — but ask yourself: does the dialogue need it? If the emotion is already obvious from context, don’t over-season your sentence.

✍️ Show, Don’t Tag

Sometimes the strongest dialogue tags… aren’t dialogue tags at all.

Instead of telling me a character “snapped,” show me:

“Get out.” Her hands trembled around the mug, knuckles white.

Boom. No tag needed. The emotion lives in the action.

This doesn’t mean never use tags — only that action beats can carry far more weight and keep your pacing tight. They’re especially powerful when juggling multiple characters, grounding the scene and giving us something visual to hold on to.

🙅‍♀️ The Over-the-Top Tag Problem

There’s a reason said-bookisms (yes, that’s a term) get roasted. Because once you start stacking them, it gets unintentionally hilarious:

“I can’t believe you betrayed me!” she gasped, growled, and sobbed.

Pick one vibe. Please. For all our sanity.

When dialogue tags compete with the dialogue itself, it’s like having two people shouting at you at once. Let the words carry the emotion unless the tag genuinely adds something essential.

🧠 My Take (and What I Do in My Writing)

I use said a lot. Like, a lot. But I also lean on action beats and, when the moment calls for it, spice things up with the occasional whispered or murmured. Balance is everything.

If I have an intense argument scene, I’ll keep the tags minimal and let the dialogue breathe. But if I’m writing a tender confession? Yeah, I might sneak in a breathed or muttered — because it changes the rhythm and grounds the intimacy.

The trick is knowing when to let the dialogue stand on its own and when to amplify it. Think of tags like seasoning: a little goes a long way.

✨ Final Thoughts

Said isn’t dead. It’s just misunderstood.

Strong dialogue doesn’t rely on fancy tags — it relies on believable character voices, layered emotion, and natural rhythm. Use said. Use other tags. Use none at all. The goal isn’t to follow rules — it’s to make readers forget they’re reading.

And if they reach the end of your book without once noticing your tags? Congratulations. You nailed it.