Feeling Anxious About My Flight Now

I am flying to Tallin, Estonia, on Good Friday. I am flying with Wizz Air and after watching a video review about them, I wonder if that is a good idea. Going on a bank holiday, everywhere is going to be packed. I was forced to pick a seat and pay for it, but I didn't want to pay for a seat. I don't care where I sit and want one randomly given to me, but they have hidden that option now. Maybe it don't exist anymore. Maybe it's their way of extracting every penny out of us. Sometimes I don't see the point of budget airlines at all. I hope I can get on this flight and enjoy it without them trying everything they can to charge me.

They are compared to Ryan Air quite a lot. Some say they are just as bad, but I've flown through Ryan Air and haven't had any issues with them. Also I saw that Luton was voted the worst airport in the country. Well, thanks for that. That really helps with my anxiety. I think it was a bad idea for me to read the reviews I had for the airline before flying and not after. Though a lot of people only tend to review when something bad happens.

Though when I see people getting denied boarding for no reason, it makes me feel like I'm walking on eggshells. After my experiance at Heathrow with the fires, I am always expecting the worse. Still, I want to go to Tallin and Helsinki. My dreams got crushed before, and I can't let that happen again. I will do anything to get on that flight. I had been waiting so long to go on this holiday. I got so many things planned.

Any more bad things, I don't think I am ever going to fly again. I don't think I will be able to afford it any more. All the times I've saved, seems to be for nothing. I am still waiting for the refund on the flights but I might not even get a lot of it back with processing fees.

Now that I've had that little vent out of the way, I completed my online check in and I will be able to download my booking passes. I am finding checking in more stressful the more I do it. I have been to so many places. I have never been to Luton before, I think, but a lot of the airports start to look the same.

I much prefer travelling by train. I find the progress of checking in on the Eurostar much easier and more fun. I hope in the future there will be more places abroad accessible by train. I try to hide my fears and anxiety about travelling. People think I am brave, I am not so sure anymore. I know I want to get away, and I think if the holiday dose not come any sooner...I think I may have a complete burnout.

I'm craving a change in atmosphere; a different world than the world I am in now. I'm tired of being tired and being in pain all the time. I've had some episodes of fainting and exhaustion. I get told different things; you're doing too much/not doing enough. Could have been multiple things. I just hope people think I am fainting and shaky for attention.

I'm glad I wrote this, it's the first thing I wrote in a while that didn't feel forced or incoherent in a while. I think maybe travel woes are normal, especially after a bad time last time. Once I finally reach those Baltic seas and the Depeche Mode bar, I will be happy.

Lots of po