NFL Week 9 Recap: Same Old Song and Dance

Stop me if you heard this one before. Buffalo Bills host Kansas City Chiefs in a high-profile clash. It's in the late window, specifically the 4:25PM Eastern slot, but it's the only one in that spot, making it nationally televised. It's a close game throughout, because of course it is. And the game is won by the Bills, because it's not late January. We have seen this so many, many, many times.

The Bills won, 28-21, over the Chiefs in Orchard Park, and that game saw Patrick Mahomes play like such ass. It's been awhile since I went to the Fantasy numbers, but let's go. Mahomes threw for 250 yards (10 points), threw an interception (one point deduction), and only ran for five yards (half point), for a grand total of 9.5 fantasy points. To any pricks who try to call Jordan Love inconsistent, Love reached 10 fantasy points in Week 9, something Mahomes didn't do.

So the Bills, yet again, beat KC in the regular season. But don't hold your breath on them doing it in January. It's not only because they can't, it's also because they may not get the chance. With Kansas City's loss, they are knocked down to #8 in the AFC, which is behind the conference's playoff line. Now, I'm not saying KC will actually miss the playoffs, but considering the season's half over and they're on the outside looking in, it's a possibility. As for the Bills, even if they don't have to deal with KC, there's still another obstacle:

It's official: the Patriots are back. The Patriots faced off against the Atlanta Falcons in a battle that actually saw the Falcons scratch and claw their way to an attempted comeback, capped off by a fourth and goal touchdown conversion. Sadly, the Falcons missed the extra point, because of course they did. The Patriots won, 24-23, their sixth straight win, and they are holding on to sole possession of first place in the AFC East. That stretch also includes a road win over the Bills over a month ago. So yeah, the Patriots are definitely back, and it's much more... natural than the old days.

So many people owe Mike Tomlin an apology right now. It's the hardcore racists who do owe him one. I know I'm a broken record right now, but here's the thing: the wannabe White supremacists who want Tomlin fired for being Black and outdoing his White counterparts are an even worse broken record. Yeah, the AFC North is closer than it should be, but look who's leading it: the Steelers. Yet all I hear is "Fire Tomlin," "Fire Tomlin," "Fire Tomlin." If a White coach was in that exact same scenario, you know what we'd hear? "He's winning against all odds!" "Coach of the Year candidate!" And what happened Sunday? Steelers beat the Colts. The same Colts who had one loss entering Week 9. Everyone said Pitt would get smashed. Didn't happen. So can you please stop the "Fire Tomlin" chants and realize that he's the only thing keeping the Steelers upright?

Week 9 began with Lamar Jackson returning to the fray and leading the Ravens to a 28-6 win in Miami on Thursday Night Football. Regarding the rest of the early window, the entire NFC North was involved, and that included the Green Bay Packers, fresh off that big win in Pittsburgh, losing to the Panthers at home. Even worse, our clutch tight end, Tucker Kraft? Torn ACL, done for the season. That loss knocked us off the #1 perch in the NFC, but we're still leading the NFC North due to the Lions losing at home to the Vikings. The division is getting crowded, though, because the Bears won yet again due to the fact that Cincy's defense can't even stop me. Elsewhere, the Niners and Chargers picked up wins against dead teams (gotta beat who's on the field), and the Broncos edged the Houston Texans.

The remainder of the late window saw the Rams blast the Saints, but the Jags/Raiders game was a standout, making history in more ways than one. The biggest historical note came from Cam Little, who made a 68-yard field goal, the longest in NFL history, surpassing the previous record of 66. I still remember when 63 was the record for so long. The game went to OT, where more history was made. Because of the current rules that allow both teams to get the ball in OT regardless, we saw an opening possession touchdown not end a game, we saw an actual extra point in OT, and we saw a second TD in OT. The Raiders' TD was followed by a two-point attempt, but that was stopped, resulting in a 30-29 OT win for the Jags--the first one point difference in an OT game.

Week 9 ended with a pair of NFC East teams being fucked on two different nights. First, Sunday Night Football saw the Washington Commanders dismantled in more ways than one, not only being blasted by the Seattle Seahawks at home, but QB Jayden Daniels ended up breaking his non-throwing elbow late in the game. So he's done for the year pretty much, leaving last year's runners-up in the NFC all but screwed. And then there's Monday Night Football. Cowboys hosted the Cardinals, and it was supposed to be an easy night for Dallas. Nope. Cardinals, with Jacoby Brissett starting, trounced Dallas. At this point, I'd like to congratulate the Philadelphia Eagles for winning the NFC East by default.

And just like that, the 2025 season is halfway done. Nine weeks down, nine to go. Even with that loss, the fact that the Packers aren't that far off from #1 in the conference at the halfway point makes me happy. I want (at least) a division title, because Jordan Love has yet to play a home playoff game. All three of his playoff starts were on the road, which comes with being a #7 seed twice. Winning the division means starting the playoffs at home, whether it's doing so on Wild Card Weekend, or getting #1 and starting the playoffs in the Divisional Playoff. But we need to win the North, and let the rest of the NFC play out. If we finish #2, #3, or #4, that's still fine.

Week 10 begins with an AFC West battle between the Las Vegas Raiders and the Denver Broncos on Thursday Night Football, and fans, get your alarm clocks set, because we have an early morning international game on Sunday. In this one, it's the Indianapolis Colts and the Atlanta Falcons in Berlin. On Sunday Night Football, the Los Angeles Chargers will host the Pittsburgh Steelers, and on Monday Night Football, the Green Bay Packers will host the Philadelphia Eagles.

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