Ripple Effects

Thoughts of who I used to be travel through my head at such a high speed, making me fall on my knees. Tears streaming down because the pain from the fall went right through my chest into my heart, making me bleed from the inside out.

Internal bleeding symptoms and effects:

Symptoms are an ache in the chest, feeling a little depressed, and isolating at your best.

The effects can be delayed in life skills, feeling like an overkill, and wanting to feel nothing more than what’s natural.

What is natural?

Is natural the normal?

Am I not normal?

I can't be the only one who experiences these kind of thoughts. In fact, statistically speaking according to healthypeople.gov 18.1% of all adults over the age of eighteen in the United States struggle with some kind of mental health within a twelve month span. In numbers, that’s 43.6 million people that struggle on a yearly basis, that is almost a quarter of the population. So almost a quarter of the population understands what it feels like to suffer from obstacles others can’t see every year. Almost a quarter of us can understand each other yet still we feel alone, shying away from everyone and everything because we think, “How can anyone else possibly understand?”

In addition, given that almost a quarter of the US population struggle with some kind of mental health issue, there are ripple effects. Those ripple effects have no bounds and they are able to travel as far as one goes and beyond. This is not necessarily a bad thing for it gives the world more knowledge and therefore hopefully more of an understanding. People may call a ripple effect from mental health struggles a negative outcome, though in my opinion that is small-minded and short-sighted.

From experience it is not about the mindset of “just get over it” that will help, because having a mind barrier is so much stronger than that. There is a constant voice in one's head, throwing harmful and destructive words, making one feel like they are carrying loads and loads of weight on their shoulders. As a result making one feel so heavy that one can hardly say or do anything without having that weight knock them down. It is debilitating to hear that you’re not enough hundreds or maybe even thousands of times a day. It would be for anyone from anyone, so why is having that said to you without others hearing it any different?

Another way to describe it is being constantly shoved into a corner with a bunch of big bullies surrounding you. They are much bigger than you, a lot more powerful than you, and a lot more willing to cause pain. While you, you being stuck in the corner wanting to make eye contact to have someone help you out but are too afraid to take your eyes off the bullies. So you just hope someone sees, you hope someone notices the situation that you’re in and they come to help you.

Sometimes someone notices, and hopefully they become more aware of the bullies and have your back whenever they see them coming around. Though sometimes, you’re left with invisible black eyes and bruises all over that only you can feel. Maybe to show those unseen bruises you make them seen by creating your own because you feel the need to expose those bullies in hopes someone can save you next time.

Next time you are faced with a mind barrier or a bully don’t be afraid to attract someones attention, to seek help because there’s no shame in asking for support. Or next time you notice someone who is facing a bully on their own, help them. Help them overcome that obstacle or bully of the moment. For the simple reason that maybe you will be the reason for one less black eye, or one less bruise in the world.

Let us start to create a positive ripple effect, lend a hand.