I woke up

I woke up this morning and the tears just rolled down my face. I thought as you get older, life would get better and I would feel stronger. Instead I woke up in so much pain. I could barely move and my body felt like a ton of bricks. I looked around and there was nobody there. I woke up and was sad, but I knew I had to push through.

I woke up and my life felt so lonely. I tried to think of all the positive things and all I could feel is darkness clouding my mind. I could not see the beautiful things around me because I was blinded by my bad health. I am tired and I am weak and I just want it to get better. Instead I just keep fighting to make it through the day.

I woke up today and it felt so familiar. Everyday, I feel like someone knocked me out with a bat. They stole my energy so I could not make a homerun. Instead I was kept in my bed like I was punished in the dugout. My life is a foul ball and nobody is around to catch me as I fall to the ground. There is no crowd to cheer me on, instead I am the only one in the stands. Everyday I just end up in the same lonely game.

I woke up today and my thoughts were like a typhoon. My tears were drowning into large puddles. There is a tornado from the storm in my life. A mess all around that happened from the storm. I looked around and all I could see is damaged houses and fallen trees. My body is almost like all the dead bodies from this storm. It felt like lighting struck my body and it broke my spirit. I could not feel happy anymore.

I woke up today and I made a decision to try and be happy. Hope is all I have. I needed to remember that there are people who love me. I have to think of the people who are less fortunate. I woke up and tried to remember that success is not given to people who make excuses or feel sorry for themselves. I know that today is a gift and that I can always make today better. My attitude determines everything. I can continue to be the possum pretending to be dead, or I can be butterfly and fly away with beautiful colors. I woke up and I decided to make things better.

I woke up and I started to cry, but than I wiped these tears away and decided to try. I examined my life to figure out what was wrong. I decided that my past trauma would not determine my life. I will not be a victim. I will not let the darkness control my thoughts, or control what I do. I decided to push myself to the light. I decided that I would do everything I can to make my life better. I will not be a deer in the headlights, and I will not be run over by the cars that past by so fast. Instead I will run fast and pass all the traffic. I will make it through to another day.

I woke up this morning and I decided to try again. I just cannot give up. I started this race when I first got sick. I strapped on my tennis shoes so I would not fall to the ground. I stay hydrated and healthy so I would not pass out. This race has no crowd and nobody is watching. I am fighting for this prize because my life depends on it. I will make it through the race, I will finish all the days. I will wake up the next day and I will go into another race and I will face another day. Everyday that I wake up is my gold medal.

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Hi, Thank you for reading my stories. I am a mother of 6 with Myalgic Encephalomyelitis/Chronic Fatigue. I am disabled and writing these stories from my bed, working towards making things better for my family. My son is in a wheelchair, but I have not strength to help him in this journey of life. Please send me a donation if you enjoy reading any of my stories. The money will be used to give my family hope. Thank you.