I have a Mental Illness

I am 37 years of age and diagnosed with Major Depressive Disorder, Bi-polar 1, panic disorder, severe anxiety and PTSD. I am hoping to help someone with what I have to say here.

I was diagnosed with the MDD in 2015 in a mental hospital I had committed myself to after being physically sick puking daily for several years, only to go through an unnecessary gallbladder surgery that didn't help. Then being told by every doctor I saw that it was all in my head and there was absolutely nothing wrong with me, made me feel completely crazy, so I put myself in a hospital to try to figure out what was wrong with me. The diagnosis was MDD, panic disorder, small touch of Agoraphobia, and severe anxiety.

I was diagnosed with PTSD and Bi-polar disorder in 2019, after my husband and I had been split for about 8 months. I was raped in that period by someone who I thought was a friend. Boy, was I wrong? This is why I was diagnosed with PTSD. My husband and I split because I felt off and something were really wrong, and I couldn't put it into words. So, I asked for a divorce when what I really needed was my support group and knowledge of what was really going on with myself.

You are the only person who knows themselves inside and out. If you have the feeling of something being off don't wait, talk to someone about it. There are people out there who make it their lives missions to help people with mental illness'. There is medicine as well as therapy and all kinds of help to be gotten. It is not as desolate as it may feel, you are not alone. Group-therapy helps when you need to know that.

My support group is my husband and my 3 children. They stick by me through thick and thin. When I have my manic episodes, I black out and don't remember anything during that period. It breaks my heart because I don't have any recollection of my actions. Nothing is ever complained about, and they just love me as they would any other day. That makes living with these mental health issues so much easier. Thank you, Charlie and children, for being so patient with me and loving me no matter what.