Harden the f&%k up
How a rubber bracelet helped change my mindset
I have lived with depression for a large amount of my adult life. I didn’t necessarily know that I was depressed, I just assumed I was someone who cried a lot more than others, that I got a lot more emotional than others, and I just was lazier than others.
I was still a police officer when I got diagnosed with depression. Turned out I was my shocked by that diagnosis than most people who knew me. When I finally had the courage to tell my friends, many of them replied “Oh we figured that out a while ago”. This was probably more jarring for me than my actual diagnosis.
I was a bit perplexed that nobody had flagged with me that they had concerns that I might be depressed, so I pressed more, and it turned out that they didn’t know how to bring it up with me.
In time I made a few decisions to help my mental health which included leaving policing, a profession I assumed I would do for the rest of my working life. I moved cities to take up a new job. I started a relationship with someone I had met through a friend. Things seemed to be going well, until…
I lost my job and broke up with my girlfriend, which left me living in a city where I barely knew anyone, and then a good friend of mine was killed in Afghanistan. My life was at the lowest it could have been.
I was living in a bit of a haze for a week or two there. I was in a funk, and I didn’t know how to get out of it.
Then a friend sent me a present, it was a simple present, only cost them a couple of dollars, but it certainly changed my mindset.
It was a small rubber bracelet with four words printed on it: “Harden the fuck up”. The first time I looked at it I smiled. That was the first genuine smile I had experienced in weeks. It made me think that maybe I needed to do something to get myself out of this downer that I was in.
I made appointments to go see a psychologist, I rang friends and talked to them, I started exercising and I started seriously looking for work. I still had my bad days, but my “inspirational” bracelet helped me focus my energy.
I still wear the bracelet, although on some occasions I turn it inside out, so the words aren’t visible (my grandma saw it once and was quite horrified).
There are loads of resources if you are struggling with depression or other mental illnesses. If someone you care about is suffering, try starting with a conversation about how they are, I can assure you they will appreciate it.
About the Creator
D-Donohoe
Amateur storyteller, LEGO fanatic, leader, ex-Detective and human. All sorts of stories: some funny, some sad, some a little risqué all of them told from the heart.
Thank you all for your support.
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Comments (1)
One day at a time....<3