Finding Inner Peace on the Island of Bali

I dragged myself off the plane and into the humidity of Bali at the Gusti Ngurah Rai International Airport in Denpasar.

I was happy to have a few days to myself despite being exhausted. It was mid-September 2017 and I would be getting on another plane in a little over a week. That flight would last far longer than the four hours I had just endured.

The last few months had been rough. After an almost eureka-like moment, earlier in the year, I’d decided to upend my world and move clear across the world on a wing and a prayer. Despite a deep knowing that I had to do it, the practical aspects were harrowing.

My days were filled with packing up my home in Perth, Australia and moving in with friends as I prepared to leave for a new life in the US. Months of meticulous planning, packing, and a spate of goodbyes had left me depleted.

Standing in the queue to passport control in the un-airconditioned airport fanning myself with my passport, I allowed some of the stress of the previous few months to drip from my body.

I needed a break from others.

The main reason for the quick trip across the Indian Ocean was a wedding. I’d been staying with friends as they planned their celebration on the equatorial island and was invited to attend. Despite the preparations, they were having problems and I’d been caught in the middle. It’s a difficult dance to become the confidant of one partner when you have a friendship with both.

I needed a break from others.

The wedding was in four days but I was desperate for some time alone so took the opportunity to spend a few days in Ubud before grabbing a ride across the island to Candidasa. I poured myself gratefully into the pre-arranged cab and allowed the driver to chauffeur me ninety minutes to my little budget resort surrounded by rainforest.

I’d heard so much about this spot. Hippies and New Agers the world over headed to Ubud for esoteric retreats and the town responded in kind. Stores lined the streets, filled with all the holistic accoutrements any self-respecting soul seeker could want. Vegan and vegetarian restaurants dotted the landscape replete with menus in English, soft bean bags, and comfy day beds.

People came here to find themselves, to search for some peace within so sorely lacking in the chaos of the world in which we live.

I dropped like a stone onto the bed, needing a few moments of stillness before venturing out to forage for food. I’d found a lovely raw food restaurant on Google Maps just minutes up the road before I’d left and intended on heading there after a dip in the enticing pool.

The restaurant was indeed exquisite. My eyes swam greedily over the menu as I took in its offerings of California maki nori, cannelloni, spinach and mushroom pizza. My mouth watered slightly as I allowed my gaze to drift to the raw desserts — a “Sexy Brownie,” carrot cake, and Black Forest pudding.

The breakfast menu looked just as delicious and I knew I’d be back the following morning before heading on an excursion. I settled on the Aloha pizza and ordered freshly squeezed watermelon juice.

With the promise of hunger abated, my eyes roamed the room, noticing a day bed positioned to my right. On it sat a couple of young women decked out in yoga pants and chatting happily in English. It seemed that this was their usual hang which made sense considering the yoga studio located on the floor above.

I smiled as I listened to their chatter bursting with the exuberance of youth, feeling relaxed and free for the first time in a while, happy to be alone and in my own space.

The food was superb. An almost transformational experience in itself and I wandered back to my hotel like a kitten drunk on milk.

Tegenungan Transformation

I hired a driver called Dua. It means “two” in Indonesian. He explained to me that many Indonesian parents name their children after numbers based on the order of their birth. A family of five may have children named One, Two, and Three — Satu, Dua, and Tiga. I stared at him with my mouth agape. Was he having me on? Was this a joke? Surely not.

Nope. He was completely serious. It was a cultural tradition so I accepted it with a little awe and continued chatting about his life as he drove me to a few recommended spots. Dua was kind and patient, traits I repeatedly experienced in Bali and I appreciated his gentle soul.

After a rice terrace, sampling some luwak coffee, and a visit to the famous Pura Puseh Batuan Temple, my guide took me to the one place he said I couldn’t miss, the Tegenungan Waterfall. It was here that I had a transcendent moment.

As I wandered down the steep stairs to the pool where the cascade emptied itself, I watched as revellers splashed water over each other, yelling and laughing as they stood beneath the crashing water. To my left were incredible wooden and stone structures created by locals as offerings to the myriad of gods that watch over Hindu worshipers.

Golden umbrellas with yellow tassels adorned the structures. I stared at a few of the stone towers, each rounded pebble carefully placed on top of the next with devotion. I felt it. I felt the love, not just for the gods to which the gifts had been presented but for me, for all of us.

I allowed the feeling to wash over me, to transform me, to carry me into the next chapter of my life without fear.

As Dua drove me back, I thanked him for his wisdom in knowing where I needed to go and what I needed to receive.

The Pyramids of Chi

On the recommendation of my travel agent, I made an appointment at the Pyramids of Chi, a sound healing wellness center on the outskirts of the jungle just north of Ubud.

“Think about something you wish to heal,” the owner said as he took us through the mandatory video presentation to prepare us for our time in the pyramids. “Allow the energy of the sound and the pyramids to heal it for you.”

As we gathered to head down into the pyramid, my thoughts settled on my left shoulder. I’d hurt it doing Dumbbell Flyes a few months back and it had been troubling me ever since. It strikes me now that I didn’t think of something emotional or spiritual to heal, my mind opting for the physical.

I lay down on the thin mat provided and placed the complimentary mask over my eyes as instructed. For the next hour, I bathed in the most incredible sounds. Gongs, drums, and crystal bowls were played in different areas of the pyramid. As our guide moved around the room, he manipulated the instruments over each of us.

Clang. A deep resonant metallic sound emanated to my right as he hit a gong gently. I felt safe and let out a breath I hadn’t realized I’d been holding.

My body responds to sounds, it always has. I’m predominantly auditory and sounds can soothe or irritate depending on frequency and pitch. I melted into my mat as I bathed in the sound bath coming from his skilled hands.

Then it was time to awake, to leave the cocoon that had been created. Reticently, I walked out of the pyramid, not quite sure I wanted to join the world again yet feeling renewed, my partially frozen shoulder gone.

Yes. Gone.

As were many of my worries and fears of the impending life change. I’m not naive and knew that many would return as I faced the challenges of the next few months, but in that moment, I had none.

Leaving for the wedding in Candidasa the next day, I felt a sadness I hadn’t felt in some time. Ubud had been transformational. I’d expected a relaxed and carefree trip but not the inner peace I found there.

My life was shifting. At the time, I couldn't possibly know how much it would change, and in ways I could never imagine, but it was changing nonetheless and it was daunting.

Seven years ago, I took a giant leap from stability into the unknown, and while my journey has been mostly treading water, the sights and sounds of Ubud created a peace within me that has never left.

Please feel free to buy me a coffee if you like what you read.