Domestic Violence

Trauma is a negative or painful emotional experience that is a threat to life or safety. Parental loss in childhood, car accidents, physical violence, military experience, and sexual assault are examples of traumatic events.

Emotional abuse and neglect in the home, a mother treated badly while disrespected in the home, household mental abuse, household mental illness, or a household member in jail are also very disturbing and affect the child into adulthood. Trauma is a person's emotional response to a distressing experience.

"65% of children experience one traumatic event during childhood"

Recognizing the symptoms and getting immediate help is very important as one of the first steps to a healthier lifestyle and keeping the mind as healthy as can be. Symptoms from trauma in children would include recreating the trauma through play, anger, irriitability, nightmares, becoming easily startled, bed wetting, anxious or fearful of others, overeating, and isolation are some of the effects. Following into adulthood causes lack of confidence, low self esteem, and impact on economic status.

Trauma harms the emotional, psychological, and physical development of oneself. It causes social discomfort, shame, fear of the future, sadness and other major health issues that can lead to death.

The Process of Asking and Remembering

At the age of 4 years old, I was sexually assautled by the man who at the time was my stepfather. Palomino is his name and he came into my mom's life and knew exactly what he was going to do. The year was 1990 when it all began and I lived with him till I was 18 years old. He was convicted in the year of 1997 but was accepted back into the home after he was charged and labeled as a sex offender in the state of Texas.

I grew up being labeled as shy, weird, poor, ugly, fat and sensitive. I was told that the abuse was a lie and I had been seeking attention from him. I was told I just wanted to have a dad in my life. I was told I was jealous my baby brother was going to be born. I was told never to speak about it again.

Going to school became my escape from him and my own mind. It was the reading, the writing, and the numbers that got me excited. I wanted to learn and discover new things about myself. I was eager to excel in school, make new friends, and be a good student. That's when my mind felt at ease.

I am 34 years old and have been a journey of self discovery since 2012. It hasn't been easy but there's no other way I would have taken. I had to ask questions, trust my memories, and get medical help for my physical and mental conditions. I am dedicated to being in tune with my spirituality, emotional, physical and mental health to break the generational negative patterns with my own children.

The Healing and my own Empowerment

Constant worrying and negative thoughts can release harmful stress hormones and do real physical damage and that's where I needed to make some changes. I needed to improve my life for my children and for my own self and not become a victim of circumstances.

It all began with getting on the internet and looking for the answers to feel better and fulfil my purpose. I started reading, writing, and exercising while taking care of my house and raising my kids. Meditating through positive affirmations has greatly impacted my beliefs and working from home has been an effective way to cope and manage my symptoms.

Participate in activities that are comforting, non threatening, and relaxing. Remind yourself and your children that they are important and it wasn't their fault. It wasn't your fault. Read a book, write in a journal, practice affirmations and exercise 30 mintes a day. Most importantly, stay away from alcohol or drugs. They only provide temporary relief and will increase feelings of depression, anxiety or isolation.

Ending the Violence, Be kind to Yourself

Life is truly a journey and not a destination. If you feel lost, depressed or confused with life there are plenty of ways to feel better and get help. It all starts with you. You are special and valuable to this world and your gift matters. Build up your confidence and skills to create the life you deserve. Focus on being self aware, honest, and dedicated to improvement.

Thank you to the great resources and people out there who are spreading the love and awareness to create a life we all deserve through our pain struggles. It doesn't matter where you came from but where you are going.