Darkness, my companion…

Raised and governed by the illusion that darkness should be avoided, kept far from the conscious self, neglected, we’ve misunderstood the purpose. But when it inevitably arrives, or even takes over, we don’t understand how to operate within or even rise above it because we’ve been taught from a place of fear how to handle or deal with darkness when it can lead to a state of abundance. Darkness is as much a part of life as light is. No one traverses the earth in complete light at all times. Light carries no value if there is no darkness involved. But what are we missing by not fully understanding our own darkness to begin with? It’s lazy and naïve to just lump darkness in with evil just as it is immature to assume black cats are a bad omen.

The way I used to envision darkness is like that of a fog or approaching storm clouds. Slowly rolling in ready to engulf you whether you want it to or not. I’ve always worked tirelessly trying to fight it and delay it in hopes of maintaining productivity and relationships, but I always succumb to the darkness only to feel as if I’ve been thrown into a state of depression or isolation with the belief that I just needed to sort out some issues and then it’ll be all better.

I was so wrong in that thought process.

It’s so juvenile of me to assume that my darkness is here simply because of some trivial issue such as my job, or life inconvenience. What if there’s a greater purpose for the darkness that I just don’t quite seem to grasp yet?

I’ve begun to now see the darkness as something that doesn’t truly go away but something that arrives to protect me from myself and my own actions that could take me away from what I’m meant to do. Instead of running from the darkness, or trying to delay it, I will lean into it. I will meditate in the darkness and focus on what is being presented as opposed to what lies on the other side of the darkness. I will not spend energy hoping and wishing to be done with the darkness.

I am within the darkness.

At the creation of this piece, I find myself in the darkness. Not consumed by it, but present within its confines and it has been more illuminating than any other time that I can recall. My eyes are open but they are not the leading decision maker in matters at this time. I am being forced to focus more on intention, intuition, and sound. Intention is tied to the action of the person and places around me. The way they are moving about when not being obstructed by requirements and obligation. My intuition speaks much louder when not being overwhelmed by what I see and feel. The eyes can be deceived by provocative acts and that can greatly influence decisions and actions before the intuition even has a chance to assess. Intuition can transcend societal restraints and conditions and lead you away from the perils we continuously place ourselves in. Sound in this instance pertains to the rhythm and cadence that we all resonate and align with. Each person has a frequency they respond best to and they also give off one depending on their intent and mood. My darkness has attuned my mind to interpreting these intangibles without having to take on the emotional baggage that comes with unpacking a person. It’s also allowed me to fine tune my own emotions to better understand what it is that I must focus on and improve.

I no longer fear my darkness because it’s here to help and protect me, but more than anything, it’s here to help me transcend this “stuck” feeling that I consistently find myself toiling in. Divinity lies within and I wish to fully embrace it but I’ve got to shed the weight of learned behavior that prevents me from ascending. Every desire and lack of power I’ve ever felt or had can be attained with the tools I already possess if I learn to focus within and fully accept who and what I am. The glimpses of greatness that sneak out are not coincidences, they’re not blips on a radar, they are pure divine actions that come from a source of more that is waiting to be unlocked. The only problem is, there’s no locksmith that can perform this job for you. You are the locksmith, you have the tools in front of you, but you’ve been taught to disregard these tools and now you are relearning how to use them, again.

A life of misery is a choice when you continue to disregard what lies within. I wish for so much more but I understand that it’s also my responsibility to get to the core of my desire and my power. Darkness plays just as much a part of that as light because the light shows you everything around you, taking the focus away from what’s inside. The darkness magnifies the things we can’t naturally see and it can be a frightening experience. Understand what you are currently comprised of and learn to accept, adapt, then evolve.

Darkness will always be here, but that doesn’t necessarily mean that it is your enemy, your darkness is YOU in your truest form. Your darkness is who you are with no mask, unfiltered and unbridled by morality. Take time to understand who this side of you is and embrace this side with love and understanding of its purpose, and you can become more than you’ve ever imagined.