You Never Stayed

I let you in.

Not just beneath my skin-

but into the softest parts of me

that even I don't touch

Night after night,

your body spoke to mine

like it meant something.

Like I meant something.

But I guess I was only

a place to rest your loneliness,

not your love.

You called.

I always came.

Hair undone,

hope tucked behind my teeth,

pretending it didn't hurt

when you left before morning.

You never promised me forever.

I know that.

But you also never said

This was nothing-

Not once.

So I filled the silence

with meaning you didn't give.

I wrote us a story

while you just turned the pages.

A whole year.

Of pretending we were almost.

Of hoping you'd wake up-

and finally see me-

not just naked,

but whole.

Worthy.

Yours.

Instead,

you ended it like we were just

a bad idea you finally fixed.

And I had to pretend

I wasn't already grieving

long before you said the words.

I still miss you

in the worst ways.

Not just your touch,

but the way I left myself believe

it meant something.

God, I needed it to mean something.

But I was the only one

who ever bled for this.

You walked away clean.

I keep waiting to hate you,

but the truth is-

I just hate me

for loving someone

who never loved me back.