Woodpecker’d House

I can hear its pecking. Chipping away at the siding, exposing new layers to the air.

To the world.

My world.

How timely, this event. As my world starts to crumble. As the walls start to fall.

The antique walls of my carefully crafted existence.

I alone, built these walls as only an innocent youth could, unknowingly putting up walls to hide my true self. The child that didn’t have a clue as too why the way he felt wasn’t acceptable, wasn’t allowed.

In defense, this disguise was nessasary for survival. Literally.

Now years later the pieces are starting to fall. Becoming a cascade of lies scattered around me.

Lies both to myself and to others, layer upon layer of the false me. I was the first casualty of these lies, somehow believing them myself. Choosing instead to look away from the truth of my makeup. I forced this dominant side of me into the shadows, where only I could see it.

My mother knew, how could she not? She too choose the lies, forcing me into the mold that society demanded. I hold no anger towards her, my anger is saved for the ignorant, the small minded Neanderthals of this world. Not entirely but mostly male losers that can’t see past their own stupidity.

Now, here, I am mostly free from the lies, to some at least. Though it seems that society still has much to learn.