while yet I long for thee
Elegy for Clyde Perry & Velma Lee Opal Cox
when the lone wail of the train speaks to me
my grief-stricken heart still pains to abide,
oh me, oh my, while yet I long for thee.
...
your shadow 'neath the trestle I can see
walking tall with a long and easy stride
when the lone wail of the train speaks to me.
...
to remember only the best my plea
when bad times come so easily to mind,
oh me, oh my, while yet I long for thee.
...
some days you weren't no good at all to see
sober at work but not at home I'd chide
when the lone wail of the train speaks to me.
...
in your arms safe I knew I'd always be
till the day we parted without goodbye,
oh me, oh my, while yet I long for thee.
...
your head came to its final rest on me
your soft breath caressed my cheek as I cried
when the lone wail of the train speaks to me,
oh me, oh my, while yet I long for thee.
About the Creator
John Cox
Twisted teller of mind bending tales. I never met a myth I didn't love or a subject that I couldn't twist out of joint. I have a little something for almost everyone here. Cept AI. Aint got none of that.
Reader insights
Outstanding
Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!
Top insights
Compelling and original writing
Creative use of language & vocab
Excellent storytelling
Original narrative & well developed characters
Heartfelt and relatable
The story invoked strong personal emotions
Easy to read and follow
Well-structured & engaging content
Masterful proofreading
Zero grammar & spelling mistakes
On-point and relevant
Writing reflected the title & theme
Where's the Glory?
In breaking news, rehabilitated Republican Senator Johnnie Johnson (Pronouns: HE, HIM, HIS) called a press conference from the Men’s room of the New Orleans Louis Armstrong International Airport, Concourse B, across from the Ignatius Reilly’s Lucky Dog stand. The Senator had just returned from a sexual reorientation rehabilitation program in Memphis, TN after being publically disgraced at a Buckee’s Truckstop restroom soliciting sex from an undercover cop three months ago. He is a founding member of the Reformed Christians for Christ, a conservative, pro-family and ex-gay advocacy group. In the spirit of being reborn, Senator Johnson invited reporters to marvel at his plans for a major remodeling of airport bathrooms.
By Cathy Schieffelin5 days ago in Humor
Comments (15)
Back to say congratulations on your Top Story! 🎉💖🎊🎉💖🎊
Viscerally stunning!
So much sadness and memories stirred in a very grounded way. Loved this take on a villanelle from you John in that strong but vulnerable and so very human poetic voice of yours. Congratulations on a well deserved Top Story my friend
Congratulations, John!!
Back to say congratulations on the Top Story, John. Well done and much deserved.
This is such a human grief, and kind of fits the form in a way I didnt expect, the way in grieving things return and meander and return.
What stands out most is how the voice moves between lament and affection. You allow grief to breathe, giving readers space to feel both the pain and the enduring devotion beneath it.
Ooo this is nice. The dungaree looks so realistic. The bricks 👌🏾👏🏾 I did not expect to finish reading this with the need to cry. But here we are. The wail of the train seems to carry your pain. Maybe mimics it. Maybe it foresaw... The shadow 'neath the trestle. This line will forever haunt me. Sober at work but not at home. Wow 😲 a shocking but relatable pain. Outstanding elegy and villanelle 👌🏾👏🏾❤️🤗
Great villanelle. I could hear the wail.
Well-wrought, John. Sounds like an old spiritual, something one might sing while walking home alone through an open field..
We all have memories good and bad, and it is how and what we do with them that counts. Your poem describes a dream that I think we all may have had at some point in our lives. Good job.
An abundance of long, abiding memories are poignantly reflected herein. There's a prevailing departing wistfulness of days long departed, mimicked by the train's passing and whistle. Yet another lovely villanelle. This format scares me silly, but methinks you excel at its potential beauty. Best of luck to you in the challenge at hand. You certainly have my vote.
This was so poignant and emotional. Sending you lots of love and hugs ❤️
This one hit hard. It’ll be two years on the 16th since my dad died. This brought me to tears fabulous work, John
This felt so sad yet comforting that memories are always at the surface and can be triggered by something simple as a passing train.