we're doing the best we can with what we've got

i don't think im ready to talk about it

but i want you to know im okay

it's not something i ever expected

how would i even

but im trying to give it the space it needs to run through me

its running me over sometimes

i just know that it was the right decision

right, best, easiest, still wrecking-ful

its amazing how something so wonderful can so delicately be destabilized

i don't think its something that can ever truly be stable

but im here, we're here, still, and still trying

trying, trying

and when it feels like its eating me from the inside

like moments ago, and moments before that

i try to remind myself that its not okay too and thats okay

feels really shitty honestly

but that its not the end

its not the end

its just another road toward the same destination

a path hopefully less bumpy with just as pretty sights

cause its not the end

its the beginning

its the beginning