Unsolved

I have an obsession with the unknown, so much that it also terrifies me.

Should it be so fascinating and terrifying?

I can listen to unsolved murder mysteries to fall asleep, but tell me that someone I care about needs to talk to me, I will throw up.

Thinking about all the possible outcomes of a singular conversation that could be about ending a relationship,

when in reality they just need their bowl back.

I can look at the most difficult puzzles on my phone and solve them with ease, but don't tell me that I did something wrong and there's no way to fix it.

I will overthink every possible way to undo the damage.

I can never leave anything unresolved or unfinished and maybe that's why I love unsolved cases,

it gives me the chance to fix something and find closure.

It gives me the ending to a story,

unlike the many pieces in my life have been left unfinished.

The proper endings that haven't happened and I cannot control,

those are my unsolved mysteries.