Undernourished
A story about a bout with anorexia that culminated in an unanswered cry for help. I have since learned to nourish myself.
Forceful masculine energy spoiled my appetite
in a selfish rage of rejection.
Nourishment – lack of mine - revealed greedy
gossip, but no confrontation. Only
silently provided superficial
glances of concern, remaining quiet
to avoid imagined embarrassment.
For whom? Silence stated a deafening
realization. There’s no nurturing here.
Only starvation by quiet control.
Carefully controlled thoughts. Controlled actions.
Unfulfilling embraces cause hushed pain.
~~~~
Don’t mind me – I’ll just continue to shrink
quietly in my corner, shut away
in my safe room so you don’t have to feel
the discomfort of unspoken inaction.
~~~~
Avert your eyes! Cover your mouth! while I pass.
~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~~
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About the Creator
KJ Aartila
A writer of words in northern WI with a small family and a large menagerie.
My Substack
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More stories from KJ Aartila and writers in Poets and other communities.
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There is always a moment — small, quiet, almost forgettable — when the spark stops being a warning and becomes a state. It never looks like a turning point from the outside. It’s not a dramatic shift. It’s not a cinematic beat. It’s a subtle internal click, a recalibration so slight that only someone who has lived this cycle as many times as I have would recognize it.
By Elisa Wontorcik2 days ago in Poets
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Already hearted, moving words