True Colors

A catalyst of change. Bursting with life. Unknown because unwritten. Nothing is promised to the chaser. Mewing at deadened hides. Disrupted from a form.

Redbone.

What does color mean to me? With thyme behind my ear… what has color done to me, don’t you mean?

“White mom?”

Yes she’s so white she’s red.

“I could tell, it’s all in your hair and the way-“

Oh…well I’m adopted. My birth mom is Nigerian. Blacker than black I’m America. So what exactly could you tell?

“Let’s be blind” to our different tones.

“I don’t see color.” They only say to their colored friends.

I don’t see you. Is what I heard you said.

Yellowbone.

Prettier than her? I don’t believe you.

I don’t have to. I know what you mean. I know it’s not between we. It’s a preference in skin.

Nothing to win. Attention from same of kin. Nothing within when they’re aiming for just skin.

“It’s not that deep.”

They say as they slice your skin.

It’s not that big. I think not even letting my eyes roll.

Honey bun

Sweet thing

A soft little B

Not supposed to put up a fight

“You’re not like them, Shine Bright.

You better act right.”

Who are your friends? Is anyone your friend when you don’t even know yourself? Won’t even know yourself….

You confide in only yourself.

You say a lot of things.

Remaining in the spotlight.

Hiding the violence done to you and through you.

What have you learned? What have you learned from hiding? You know nothing of yourself and spend hours making up stories of others. You know of them even less. There is no soul… Not one soul you can call yours. Could you have really chosen this? Chosen this skin, made by mixed up kin? My skin is a highly coveted sin.

Dramatic? My feeling is stifled by people who just.don’t.know.

Ridiculously getting to know thyself.

“To thine own self be true.”

So I can learn how to be safe…. To finally feel worthy of being safe.