toxic endings

you peel the skin from my body

like it is the packaging

to the toy car you wanted when you were ten

eager to find what is hidden beneath

only to be disappointed

with my quivering bones of exhaustion

crumbling away in your needy palms like dirt

i am nothing more than

what lies on the surface

there are no longer constellations in my veins

moonlight does not fill the gaps in my bones

and the flowers you loved have long forgotten

how to grow in the cavity of my lungs

because your hands were too focused

on stripping me of the universe

for you to notice that all you

left behind was a skeleton encased by skin

----------------------------------

they still flutter, in the pit of my stomach

every flap of their wings

seemingly sounds like each syllable of your name

because they no know purpose

other than you

making new cocoons to continue the cycle

of patiently waiting

to come alive again

-------------------------------------

how long can I swim before

I too become the water

or will my fate be to drown

vanish to the sea floor

for my bones to join the crushed rocks

and become sand

the same kind you wiggle your toes in

would you enjoy the feeling

of my body below you

the power of demolishing me with

every

little

step

so no one can find

the person before me

--------------------------------------

there is lightening crackling in my blood

striking me down

until I become ash in the storm

to be washed away by the rain that pours

at 2:08 on Monday mornin's

while the thunder shakes the sky

and the wind plays your melody

wailing the words caught in your esophagus

because you would always settle for

I'm sorry

to cover these mistakes

only this time it's too late

my body has already disappeared

down the sewer drain

--------------------------------------

everyone asked why I stayed for so long

how could someone be that blind

to blood red flags waving in their face

but I had become lost in his forest fire

unable to distinguish

between the good and bad

as the embers I felt

dance across the curve of my spine

with skillful fingertips

became the same ones

you pressed against my inner wrist

during 4am fights

because the words on your tongue lost their flame

no longer providing the sizzling stench

of burned flesh you wished to smell

so maybe I had forgotten which was love

it felt impossible not to

when you were all types of warm

-------------------------------------------