Too Much, Not Enough

I am too much.

Too feeling,

Too needy,

Too heavy.

"Cheer up," they say. "Live in the moment."

But my moments stretch and growl

A never-ending spiral of static and fear.

I am not enough.

Not good enough,

Not brave,

Not steady.

A deep hibernation calls to me

A stillness that soothes as much as it scares.

"Embrace the good," they insist.

"See how much there is to have."

I try, as I sit alone in this dark hotel room.

Eating broken cookies

The sign on the elevator:

”Out of Order”