Thursday 8:08

I'm having trouble sleeping and saying I love you

That's not because the pillows are too soft or the heat is on, or the mattress is sinking in on your side / Not because I always sleep better with piano playing between my ears or my throat gets dry too often / Not because I can feel my heartbeat like temptation and no, breathing exercises don’t slow it down / Not because you don’t say it or show it or make me feel it / Not because the sun is creeping up behind our heads or the cold on my ribs is keeping me alive / I’m not sure I can tell you what you want to hear / I’m not sure I can hold you with my eyes and kiss you with my hands / I’m not sure I can overcome myself to find you next to it / My body / My body / My body / Hold me / still-ly / So I may drift into the rest / Of us / Where I don’t love you the way I want to / But the way you need to be loved / still-ly

— ODH