This Is About Money

This poem is about money.

It is about not having enough of it

and thinking about it more than I want to admit.

It is about checking my bank account

before I check my pulse in the morning.

It is about the way money affects my breathing,

my posture,

my tone of voice when I answer the phone.

I am concerned about financial instability.

I am concerned that creative work does not pay reliably.

I am concerned that effort does not guarantee income.

I am concerned that intelligence does not prevent scarcity.

This is not about greed.

It is about stability.

It is about the tension between dignity and dependence.

It is about how money shapes choices:

where I live,

what I attempt,

how generous I can afford to be.

I do not want money to define my value.

I do not want money to dictate my nervous system.

But it does influence both.

This poem is about the fear of not having enough

and the discipline required not to panic.

It is about wanting financial strength

without becoming hardened by it.

It is about responsibility.

It is about the cost of independence.

It is about building something that sustains me

instead of constantly proving that I can survive without support.

This poem states its concern directly:

I want stability.

I want income that matches my effort.

I want to stop thinking about money every day.

That is the central concern.

—Flower InBloom