Think before you speak.

Think before you speak

Don’t judge me.

I say what’s on my mind and I got a lecture for it?

Thanks, not really though.

I write down what's on my mind because no one listens.

I won’t have a conversation with someone who thinks, I’m arguing with them every time I speak.

Take the time to think before you react.

You don’t know the past.

You don’t know my history.

I’m done with everyone thinking I'm aggressive and arguing.

You have no idea what went on inside that house.

You have no idea what went on in that hospital.

You have not even seen a fraction of how blunt I can be.

I’ve decided.

As a terminally ill patient, your arguments don’t matter to me.

My interpretation and understanding is my reality.

That’s all that matters.

Stop acting like a child, when an adult woman is being honest with you.

Turn your back, that’s fine.

It’s what everyone is best at when dealing with terminally ill and mentally ill patients.

Its okay, I forgive you

Im Irish…….. Strong and resilient like my gram.

I don’t need people who know nothing about me telling me what to say and how to live my life.

Key word there : MY

Yes My life, I’m going to keep pushing. Even until my last breath.

Until I have nothing left.

Nothing left to give or say.

These are MY words and emotions and reality, no one else.

So before approaching me like a tornado, next time take a break and think about how you’re coming across to a terminally ill, dying young woman.

Who’s expressing pain and anguish.

And trying to move on from her past.

Because soon I won’t have one.

I’ll leave voids here and there, questions and doubt,

But I can’t live without my right to my own freedom of speech.

I’m sorry if you're hurt but, I’ve been hurting my whole life.

No one can take that hurt away

Not time, therapy, medications, faith.

Nothing.

I just write to speak my mind, like it or not the words are mine

Art is eternal, and my life.

It’s short.

-ej