Things That Make You Go, Hmm

Why do bars let you park if you can’t drink and drive

If crime doesn’t pay, how do politicians thrive

Can people grow old in the absence of time

And since crime doesn’t pay, isn’t working a crime

Now how can a battle be called “civil” war

Are the “fruits of a war” a true metaphor

And why was the boxing ring made into a square

What box do the bald check for “color of hair”

We drive on a parkway but in driveways we park

Why “call it a day” when it starts getting dark

A duck swims in water but it never gets wet

How come a psychic doesn’t win every bet

Is the hummingbird simply the happiest bird

And why is “abbreviate” such a long word

If your nickname is “Tiny,” you’re never that thin

When attempting to fail, when you fail do you win

How come feet are what smells but it’s noses that run

Why spell the word “funeral” starting with “fun”

How ironic there’s peace only after a fight

Will you ever arrive on a non-stop flight

There’s hemorrhoids on booty’s and asteroid’s in space

And if chickens act foolish, is egg on their face

If a King’s being used is he somebody’s pawn

Does a vegan’s mouth water when mowing the lawn