Things People Say to Therapists at Dinner

“So, what do you really think about me?”

“I don’t need therapy,

but...”

(They do.)

“Can I tell you something weird?”

(It will not be weird.

It will be tragic.)

“I know you’re off the clock,

but...”

(You are not.)

“You’re analysing me, aren’t you?”

(No. I’m choosing potatoes.)

“You must be so good at boundaries.”

(We laugh politely.)

“You should write a book.”

(I am too tired to hold a pen.)

“You’re so calm.”

(That is a learned behaviour.)

“Anyway, sorry, I’ve dumped on you.”

(They have not stopped.)

And finally,

the classic -

“But you’re a therapist.”

Which is how they excuse

taking without asking,

leaving without noticing,

and assuming

Someone else will carry it.

We smile.

We chew.

We pay the bill.

And later,

alone,

We finally put ourselves

back together.