Theorize

I dreamed of a big family

then too not have a big family

though more than one kid

I don’t want my one kid to grow up

and be selfish, like everyone

needs to pay attention to just them.

II an accident happened

body parts were broken

smashed

reassured about marriage

and lots of kids

People who were trusted

and loved

named my future for me

I will never have kids

they did not want me to relive

the horrors of my accident

that I did not cause

deny me unconditional

love by creating and bring

a brilliant little innocent into

the world

III I waited till my body got old and empty

choose not to marry or have children

though my suitors who proposed only

cared about having kids they could

get out of the marriage

They tried to define me by a cold, machine

with no feelings, that knew nothing about love

IV Often times I think of reasons or situations

that I could have told my kids

How I would protect them of all the evils in life

Not punish them like I was punished

Unlike my parents I would protect my little innoscents

and not use them as bait when the hunting season

has ended I would not give them to men to

harm or use them for pleasure

V When my kids would want to know about their

family

what will I tell them

Will they know the dangers

would they remember what I have already

warned them about

VI Would they be

selfless and give what they have

to someone in need

Would my families karma come through

the little innocent

and they be hateful