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The Open Line

Don't leave me here

By Iris ObscuraPublished 8 months ago Updated 8 months ago 1 min read
Runner-Up in Tattoo This Line Challenge
Art by Iris Obscura

The phone rings

only once.

Like someone remembering

then deciding against it.

-

He lets it hang—

picks it up the second time.

And there she is.

Pressed against the signal

like lungs against a scream.

Sharp,

like ozone.

Like rust.

Like roses drowned in their own water.

-

She unfurls his name like a dare.

The voice isn’t hers anymore.

−·· --- − .----. − / .-.. . .- ...- . / -- . / .... . .-. .

Static.

“If you don’t love me—

don’t make it gentle.”

Click.

-

But the line won’t die.

It keeps on breathing through stitched lips.

His knuckles bleach.

The receiver sweats.

That sentence stays curled in his ear

like an ingrown nail.

-

And maybe she’s gone.

And maybe she never was.

-

The sky keeps bleeding.

The line runs hot.

That sentence she left

still pulses like meat.

Not every wound closes—

some just learn how to speak.

.

surreal poetry

About the Creator

Iris Obscura

Do I come across as crass?

Do you find me base?

Am I an intellectual?

Or an effed-up idiot savant spewing nonsense, like... *beep*

Is this even funny?

I suppose not. But, then again, why not?

Read on...

Also:

>> MY ART HERE

>> MY MUSIC HERE

Reader insights

Outstanding

Excellent work. Looking forward to reading more!

Top insights

  1. Compelling and original writing

    Creative use of language & vocab

  2. Easy to read and follow

    Well-structured & engaging content

  3. Heartfelt and relatable

    The story invoked strong personal emotions

  1. Masterful proofreading

    Zero grammar & spelling mistakes

  2. On-point and relevant

    Writing reflected the title & theme

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Comments (5)

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  • Dalma Ubitz8 months ago

    IRIS FOR THE WIN!! Congratulations!! Oh, the ingrown toenail rhyme was absolute genius.

  • Sam Spinelli8 months ago

    Wow. This is so tense and uncomfortable. Love it, excellent word choice and atmosphere building. Fantastic poetry :)

  • Wooohooooo congratulations on your win! 🎉💖🎊🎉💖🎊

  • "Don't leave me here." Such tension, nay, desperation on both ends of the line.

  • Mother Combs8 months ago

    Lovely, Iris <3

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