The mask

The mask gets so heavy

It is needed

Necessary

The only thing to cling to

And yet

The mask gets so heavy

What point is there

What purpose

In crying out in pain

For internal wounds

No one, nothing that could

Possibly hear 

Has any hands capable of helping

Healing the hurt

The hurt is deep and persistent 

Caused by the self

So what point is there

What purpose

None

And so

The mask, so carefully

Meticulously in place

To live when that's the

Only feasible goal

To survive

And the mask allows that

And yet

The mask gets so heavy

It slips out in the shower

So even I cannot tell

Cannot fathom the difference

Between water and tears

Gasps of rage and surrender

Lost in the thunder of

Heavy drops on porcelain

Until the breathing slows

Shaking hands slowly

Meticulously raise the mask

To my trembling face

And another day

Is gone and I

Am still alive

And yet

The mask

Gets

So

Heavy