The hunt for happiness

I was clumsy,

I was never the wolf I wanted to be

— nor the tiger—

I was a pug, or a

Chunkin’ house cat

Weak and silly

I was clumsy, yes

But I took myself seriously

I stalked through life

Focused

Always on the prowl, hunting for happiness

And satisfaction…

I thought I saw some— back in college

But I’ve lived a modern life,

Too much TV,

Means my eyes aren’t so good

I had to creep close, to get a better look

But—

With each unpracticed step

I proclaimed my

(Clumsy)

Approach

I stepped hard on the twigs and the leaves

And before I’d drawn anywhere near enough to see

My prey looked up, but did not flee

You see, there was no need

For what creature would flee a roly-poly fur-ball like me?

Happiness stood and watched, I curled in on myself,

I prepared to pounce!

But again

I’ve lived a modern life

Cushioned by amenities and shelter

My muscles could only coil so far—

I was too weak to achieve that one mighty leap

Happiness shrugged and sidled away

I gnawed my knuckles

I regrouped

I would not let my failure be final

I tried to shed my modern softness

I tried to be less clumsy

I honed my claws

I practiced my bite in the mirror

I worked on myself

And then I gave chase

Over the hills of the Southern Tier

Through the streets of New York City

We ran,

And

Happiness laughed

Ever out of reach

I strained and I slavered at happiness’ heels

I chased happiness along the Long Island shores, I was close enough to feel drunk off the sight!

Happiness filled my eyes

I knew if I could just lay hold of this sight

I would be fulfilled

I reached out, with confident glee

But happiness slipped through my fingers

And happiness left me in the dust

Blinking in the sunlight

Panting,

Wondering

What I was chasing after all

I wanted to hate the prey I could not catch,

But all I could hate was myself

For being so clumsy

And fumbling every approach

A hunt implies some chance of success

But all I was doing was giving chase

I realized that this game would stay one step ahead of me

Unless I changed the fundamentals

I had to put my brain into it

I decided:

To catch happiness I’d have to

Study

I’d have to learn what I was truly after

I’d have to understand my prey

I picked up the binoculars

And lo!

I wasn’t chasing happiness at all!

Some of those letters were just stripes and spots—

Camouflage and mimicry

To throw a hunter off his game

But now

My target was revealed by its true name!

I spent so many years

In the wilds,

Believing I chased happiness

Only to discover

That

I’d never catch it

Because

All along

I was only chasing after

H A P P I N E S S