The Human Dilemma

The whirlwind inside my brain taps my gut.

I’m hungry…or I’m not.

It tells me to be careful…or reckless.

I shake my head for clarity trying to figure out what I’m thinking.

What am I doing?

The fog hits me hard so I can’t see

The light

Or the dark.

Just fog.

Something just brushed me.

In a panic I spin hoping to be

One with myself, my mind, brain and me.

What am I doing?

Where did it all go wrong?

When did it all go right?

I try to hold to sanity to fight this fight

But I can’t.

I’ve lost.

Or did I?

My hands hold my head to keep my brain sane

What would I do if I let go?

I couldn’t let people know

I could never show

How psychotic I am inside.

The voices, the Voices, THE VOICES

What am I doing?

How did I make these decisions?

How did I stop caring?

I was never good at sharing

Feelings that weren’t happy

Why did I stop preparing?

My twisted mind constantly changes.

It sucks in the fantasy I created

Or is it my reality?

I can’t do this anymore.

What am I doing?

My life

My love

My sanity

My me

All three are not in harmony

Wait, four.

The knock on the door

To my mind rings horror

Who is on the other side?

I can’t take much more

I’ll go crazy for sure

Not much left I can endure

Dare I open the door?

It’s me. Quietly smiling

While the whirlwind gently whispers serenity.

Calmly, it speaks to me.

Keeping me sane

Holding the chaos in my brain

So I can function

It’s all okay.

For now…

Or is it?