The Eye of the Beholder

Did your mother kiss your head...

Like you were the best thing since sliced bread?

Did she gaze into your eyes...

Like you were the ultimate prize?

Did you catch her every breath...

When she hugged you with the intensity of such?

How did you learn to love yourself?

Or did you never know anything else?

Please, tell me the secret or where you found it

I've searched for the utmost, the rarest, yet that which seems prevalent

A well-dressed woman, latte in hand

The shiny sports car driven by a middle-aged man

One million followers affirming your identity

As wonderful, exceptional

Is that the key?

A life well-lived?

An ability?

Do I go backward or forward...

In my quest for the undiscovered?

A glimpse here. A glimmer there.

Planted a seed...

The desire for more

My therapist tells me to focus on the things that bring me joy

So I put my energy into each and every decoy

A new purse, people pleasing

Impressing others in an attempt to be seen

Well that didn't work

Now I feel worse

Enter an old familiar motto

…persona non grata

Those low moments, when I'm the most letdown

Become the greatest opportunities for love to be found

If your mom was like mine

Doing the best she could at times

If your pleas for acceptance weren't fully understood

Your worth underdeveloped into adulthood

If you get off track every now and then

Lose sight of yourself; Make a U-turn

Just remember what's missing cannot be attained

By a magic potion applied to the face or monetary gain

Though there are plenty who will tell you otherwise

I no longer listen to all their lies

Because true inner beauty

Is more like a quality

Which only appears when I connect with the innocent child that was once me