The Colors of Cid

I have always said that tiedye is my favorite color

and I guess that makes sense.

I live a colorful life!

From my bright red hair to my

green-grey eyes,

I embody color and

I surround mySelf with color.

Teal shelves hold books organized by the color of their spine.

Bright stripes on a Mexican sarape draped over the couch.

Pops of purple in throw pillows on an apple red Lovesac.

A huge pink unicorn stretches across the guest room bed.

A multitude of hues tumble out in yarn form

from a turquoise tote that says “Follow your heart”.

Color is magic. It fills me and spills over...

The colors of my emotions mix and play like the swirls in my favorite

tiedyed apron resting from thick straps on my strong, capable shoulders.

The stormy blue of my grief-fog sadness

carried alongside the sparkly amethyst purple of Spirit connection.

The deep, true red of unconditional love

held for my boys, one alive and one dead.

The wispy, daffodil yellow of girlhood innocence past

blends into the lush, verdant green forest of doubts in my head.

Amidst the chaos and confusion,

I still choose a colorful life.

I have been curious about the alternative…

the placid numbness of checking out.

I see those folks, trudging their way

through a black and white existence.

Smeared like so many grey watercolors

into a plain paper background.

Do they feel safe in their inkblot image existence?

Even when it’s hard, I choose color.

The sharp colors of pain--

of loss and longing--

are a price well-paid to be surrounded by

a full palette of hues.

Every imagined crayon in the box

to color a life worth living.