The Body Wanes
a direct address
Even now, I think about your vulnerable waxing,
clinging to us with a bold strobe-light, spotlight, nestling your tragedies
like soft truffle hearts. Loud against a jaw, the crack of you
is personal-only, two disparate textures fighting for melding,
proving silk is rougher than stone. You were never quite that—
stone—more like atmospheric fog around an old face. How’s it feel,
eclipsed by your own cosmic map? You know these bodies don’t lie.
About the Creator
Mackenzie Davis
“When you are describing a shape, or sound, or tint, don’t state the matter plainly, but put it in a hint. And learn to look at all things with a sort of mental squint.” Lewis Carroll
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Copyright Mackenzie Davis.
Reader insights
Nice work
Very well written. Keep up the good work!
Top insight
Excellent storytelling
Original narrative & well developed characters
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More stories from Mackenzie Davis and writers in Poets and other communities.
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Comments (24)
Interesting!
Predictably brilliant Mackenzie 🥰 Congratulations for TS. I love reading and writing anything that references the moon (you may have noticed 😂), so this started on a positive. The duality of the person is magnificently distilled to ‘small truffle hearts’ that ‘crack’. Great work x
Congrats on Top Story!
Beautifully written
Very well written :) I love its depth, how much it makes you think, all the different layers that you can just keep on peeling…
Hmmmmmmmmm. Your diction is alluring. You've written poetry for quite some time I see. "Even now" To open up this way creates a kind of misdirection, a haziness about where the story actually began i.e. the engagement with the moon. Then there's the talk of "strobe light" and "spotlight". A light that can damage if stared at too long, and another one that denotes fame; paparazzi. When I got to "Loud against a jaw"...I couldn't help but think what the hell!? But now it seems like it was more of a jaw-dropping moment. Also that everything is energy, that is, frequency: sound. The use of "loud" is clever. Then the idea of forging weaponry, implying a blacksmith, except this is the work of feminine energy. I love that intentional swap of this role to other sex. Personally, I always think of the effeminacy when it comes to the moon, so this was reassuring. Yeah, this was great to read. Spellbinding, enchanting, hypnotic. :)
I like these acrostics with some depth to them. Congrats on top story too.
Congratulations on TS!
Congrats on top story!!
Back to say congratulations on your Top Story! 🎉💖🎊🎉💖🎊
Dear, dear Mackenzie, please forgive me, but when I read that first line -- "I think about your vulnerable waxing" -- MY thoughts went to another kind of waxing (particularly where we are vulnerable!) ... Of course, once I reached the second line I was back to "soft truffle nestling" in the spell of your poetic genius.
Nice work 👍
Congrats on Top Story.
The idea of taking an eclipse and using the contrast of light and shade that are its hallmark... and applying it to a pair of mismatched lovers .. well... it is ace! Fab stuff.
Congratulations on your top story.
Oh my. This is incredible. I especially love the last line. Congrats on the TS.
Congratulations 🎉🎉 for top story loved your acrostic poem
Ah, well one of them was bound to be Top Storied. Well done Pal!
Ahhhhh this is beautiful and perfect. That opening line is a masterpiece all on its own. “nestling your tragedies like soft truffle hearts” Perfect perfect perfect!! ‘proving silk is rougher than stone’ I love that! You are so talented
"...more like a heat-conducting metal..." just one of many wonderful phrases.
oooft...brought it with this one too...hear nothing from busy Davis and then boom. Well done and hope you're doing alright over there!
“proving silk is rougher than stone” is all kinds of vivid, and I get the sense of satisfaction from the speaker. I like how you’ve played with the form to blend the lines together, so it feels like acrostic-y.
Oooo, so intense. Freaking loved your Acrostic!
🤩🤩🤩 Straight from the mind of Mackenzie! Loved it!