The Accident

Baby, we are about to crash. Buckle up and brace for impact. We knew this was coming. I tried talking to you before we arrived here. Raising of voices, the tears and sadness. It’s all closing in and my heart is breaking. Hands gripping tight, body tensing up ready for the blow. Tires screeching and glass shatters.

My head hit the dash hard and I woke up. I’m not that person anymore. I’ve grown up and I’m learning. I was never perfect and always tried. I wish the air bag would have saved me from the impact. In many ways I’m glad I hit the dash. It’s what I needed to see things differently.

Take me back to when it was good. When we had love for one another. Take me back to when I didn’t feel like a roommate or a maid. There were moments we shared, that I could feel your love then we lost it. I wanted your last name for the longest time then I just wanted your friendship. My knight to save me from the pain and my shelter I’d run to. Now. I’d run into the storm to be away from you. The kiss, the magic, tears, sadness, fights and the madness from it all. We crashed baby. Scraps, burns and bruises. Glass everywhere just like my shattered heart. I thought I knew you but I really don’t. You drove us off the road, when I wanted to coast through life with you.

Our lives a mess because we couldn’t fix what was broken. Our son suffering from having us divided when we should have remained as a family. I cry my self to sleep at night longing to be with my blue eyed baby. Wishing you had fought for us.

Life goes on and he’s growing up without me. The sacrifices made for his happiness. I’m growing up. I hit that dash hard, that I’ve awaken to a new person. The person I wish I was long ago. It’s time to take over and drive this time. A new course and an unknown destination. I don’t know where the road will take me but I, know I’m not crashing. My blue-eyed baby is in my sights and that’s where momma will go.