Strength in Blue

Strength in blue

This path that I have walked forever

Stretches farther than I can see

And I can still feel the weight of every mistake

In my struggling heart and aching feet

I sometimes wonder why I wander

Each step a promise I have made

To not have suffered all for nothing

To let my efforts be in vain

The black marks you left in my heart

The crimson cuts upon my skin

The history I’ve tried to hide

Every time I’ve given in

Every time I’ve hit the floor

And every time I stood again

My heart beat starting up once more

Rising back up from the dead

I followed blindly into the dark

To silent realms of quiet pain

I gave you far too much of me

Mistakes I’ll never make again

I had never been so lost

Never been quite so alone

Lesser than the weakest ghost

I found myself without a home

Staring down from high above

My feet were dangling in the sky

Trying to will myself to jump

Wanting nothing but to die

The endless gray surrounding me

With cold unfeeling empty eyes

Never noticed or didn’t care

About the pain I couldn’t hide

Yet somewhere deep inside my mind

Something spoke in my own voice

Reminding me of who I was

Reminding me I had a choice

To let the gray flow through my soul

And let it pull me off the edge

Or be the light I’d been searching for

And drag myself back from the ledge

No longer wonder why I wander

Each step a promise made in faith

To be more than you had tried to make me

To not be murdered by your hate

To leave the pain you brought behind me

Farther back than I can see

The scars upon my skin remind me

To let your sickness die with me

To never pass on to another

The silent grey you forced on me

Breathing life into an empty world

Letting light shine forth from me

Every day another choice

To see the truth behind your lies

Remind myself how far I’ve come

And bring the blue back to my eyes

By Nicholas Wright