According to Jim Stafford… I d0n’t like spiders and snakes
Well, folks, some claims are merely hoaxes and fakes
The beautiful spider weaving a silken web
Is merely creating a final resting bed
For those poor creatures winging and crawling about
The flies and roaches that make me shout
Snakes slithering along, sinuous and graceful
Swallowing vermin ridden rodents for which I am grateful
Yes, some are dangerous, venomous, deadly
But some slight caution and a haunting medley
Can keep our eight legged friends happily ensconced
In their sticky webs of wonder
Into which I shall refrain from a blunder
Banana spiders of yellow and black
I carefully avoid, taking a step back
As for our hourglass bedecked keepers of time
They may tick along happily despite my silly rhyme
They can take a licking and keep on ticking
As in their webs my fingers I’ll not be sticking
So I named my shiny, venomous black widow Timex
Since I won’t his back be flicking even when on Sinex
While my no legged friends from grassy plains and sun warmed rocks
Shall not find their way into carelessly discarded boots or socks
Black snakes are nice and dispose of many pests
Despite in my hedges they take their rests
Red on yellow, danger ahead… one little bite and I’m dead
Black on yellow safe as can be
As I’m not colorblind I’m okay you see
Many are colorful, beauteous, fascinating you know
Patterned and dressed as if for a show
So, despite old Jim and his melancholic song
With spiders and snakes I do get along
It’s people I have issues with … …
😉🕷️🕸️🪳🦟🦗🐜🐞🐜🦗🦟🪳🪰🕸️🕷️😉
About the Creator
Andrew C McDonald
Andrew McDonald was a 911 dispatcher for 30 yrs with a B.S. in Math (1985). He served as an Army officer 1985 to 1992, honorably exiting a captain.
https://www.amazon.com/Killing-Keys-Andrew-C-McDonald-ebook/dp/B07VM843XL?ref_=ast_author_dp
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Comments (3)
Oooo, ensconced is a new word for me. I didn't know that banana spiders are actually a thing. And yes, it's humans I have issues with hahahahaha. Loved your poem!
lol, I actually read this in Jim's voice. I really loved this a lot, Charles.
Very clever poem! Great rhymes… I especially love Times/Sinex. There was a day when I knew every word to that zany fun song… it was one of my favorites back in the day!